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Monday, June 9, 2014

Debunction Junction - Article #2 - Debunking The Genesis Flood As Depicted In The BUY-BULL! Another EPIC FAIL!


Painting depicts the flood in the mythological story from the book of Genesis in the Bible
Welcome to Debunction Junction! 

And climb aboard the Midnight Science Express!


Ding ding ding ding ding ding ding SHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSH! Whoo! Whoo! Clickity-clack clickity-clck clickity-clack! And off we go on the Midnight Science Express!  

Tonight, as we pull out of Debunction Junction, we shall begin our second journey, another one of many such journeys that we will be taking as we travel through the dangerous realm of stupidity, and exploring the Land of the Tards. And also, as usual . . . passengers would be well advised to stay on board the train because the tards out there can be quit hostile and even very dangerous! So, be warned!

I can never emphasize this enough!!!

The conductor will now punch your tickets. As you all know . . . . . the train tickets are for FREE! Yes, it doesn't cost you anything to ride on this train. 

Train Tickets are FREE!!!
Tonight, in the dinner coach, we will have a special triple entrée as we will be serving up Kent Hovind, his son, Eric Hovind, and "Dr" Walt Brown's bitch asses up on a silver platter!

And no, please, passengers! Please, no references to The Three Stooges! OK? Because that would actually be an insult to The Three Stooges! OK? So, we'll just call them The Three Douche-bags! Anyway . . . their bitch asses served up on a silver platter ought to be quite tasty, and we still have some left-over Ken Ham sandwiches from our previous journey through the Land of the Tards! 

And, as usual . . . after your meal, kick back and relax at the smoker's lounge in the rear coach. The Smoking Lounge is in  the rear coach out of consideration for the non-smokers in the more forward coaches. Albert Einstein and Dr. Clyde Tombaugh (whom I knew personally at NMSU back in the 1970s) were pipe smokers. So, smoke 'em if ya got 'em!

We are now pulling out of Debunction Junction. Just listen to the wheels grumbling beneath the floor, and kick back and relax as you feel the train swaying and rocking to the  gentle beat with the rhythm of the rails as we go a-rumblin' hurly-burly down the track into the Land of the Tards. 

OK, before we can start debunking the Genesis flood, we also have to start with the Creation Myth at the beginning of Genesis. So, the conductor will be passing out some  old King James Bibles to each and every one of you passengers on board this train! Yes! The King Jimmy Bible, as we like to call them.

Yeah! That's right, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls! We is a gonna have us a little Bible study here! OK?

And by the way . . . if you were to go into the typical home of an atheist or agnostic, you will notice, they usually have shelves with lots of books, and almost every atheist has a Bible in his/her home. Now, why is that? Because most atheists love to study the Bible for the purpose of debunkery! The typical atheist knows his/her Bible far better than most devout Christians, many who have never actually read their Bibles but only listened as their pastors read select passages to them. If only they knew about the really bad parts that their pastors never read out loud to their congregations, they might become disgusted with what is in their Bibles and chuck them into the trash!

Well, anyway . . . . . on with our Bible study . . .   

So, please my dear passengers, join me in the entertainment coach where we will have our Bible study, and we'll also have a music break.

OK now . . . let's begin, at the beginning . . . . .

Genesis Chapter 1: The Creation of Light

1 In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth. 2 And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters. 3 And God said, Let there be light: and there was light. 4 And God saw the light, that it was good: and God divided the light from the darkness. 5 And God called the light Day, and the darkness he called Night. And the evening and the morning were the first day.
OK, right off the bat . . . we already have a problem here! What was the source of the light? Obviously, nothing was mentioned about the sun, moon, or stars yet. Was God the source of the light? Who knows?

Let us continue . . .

6 And God said, Let there be a firmament in the midst of the waters, and let it divide the waters from the waters. 7 And God made the firmament, and divided the waters which were under the firmament from the waters which were above the firmament: and it was so. 8 And God called the firmament Heaven. And the evening and the morning were the second day.

Now, we have another problem! The firmament was called heaven. So, are we to believe that there was both waters below the firmament AND waters above the firmament, above the heaven? The waters below said firmament would naturally be the oceans, lakes, and rivers. We get that! OK? 

In the past, I have heard some Christian Fundamentalists explain it like this . . . that their is more than one heaven, like, three heavens. OK, let's examine this further. The first heaven is said to be the earth's atmosphere, and the waters above would be the clouds in the sky. OK, so far, so good. The second heaven would be outer space beyond the earth's atmosphere. OK, that sound plausible, so far. And of curse, those would be the two physical heavens. The third heaven would be somewhere, someplace where God and all his angels reside, the Spiritual Heaven. Well . . . OK!

But let's go further . . . .

9 And God said, Let the waters under the heaven be gathered together unto one place, and let the dry land appear: and it was so. 10 And God called the dry land Earth; and the gathering together of the waters called he Seas: and God saw that it was good. 11 And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, and the fruit tree yielding fruit after his kind, whose seed is in itself, upon the earth: and it was so. 12 And the earth brought forth grass, and herb yielding seed after his kind, and the tree yielding fruit, whose seed was in itself, after his kind: and God saw that it was good. 13 And the evening and the morning were the third day.

What??? Still no mention of the sun yet? How can there be days and nights without the rising and setting of the sun? Again, what was the source of light in the beginning when God said let there be light? Was God the source of the light and warmth needed for plants to grow? Did the earth rotate in relation to God? Uh . . . back then, when Genesis was written, those primitive goat herders and sheep shaggers believed the earth was flat and didn't know it was turning on it's axis. So, did God just fly around up in the sky for the first three days of creation, causing the first three days and nights?

Let's continue with this moronic fiasco! OK?

14 And God said, Let there be lights in the firmament of the heaven to divide the day from the night; and let them be for signs, and for seasons, and for days, and years: 15 And let them be for lights in the firmament of the heaven to give light upon the earth: and it was so. 16 And God made two great lights; the greater light to rule the day, and the lesser light to rule the night: he made the stars also. 17 And God set them in the firmament of the heaven to give light upon the earth, 18 And to rule over the day and over the night, and to divide the light from the darkness: and God saw that it was good. 19 And the evening and the morning were the fourth day.


Oh boy! Now we really have a problem! A big fat problem!!!

OK, now God finally gets around to creating the sun and the moon. The stars were just sort of an after-thought (he made the stars also) bits and pieces of scrap left over from the creation, I guess. And he set them in the firmament. Uh . . . remember back earlier, the Bible said that there were waters below and above the firmament? And I was speculating that the firmament was probably the earth's atmosphere, and the waters above said firmament were probably the clouds in the sky! Well, I guess I had that wrong! It turns out, that the firmament is where the sun, moon, and stars were placed. So, does that mean that there are waters above the sun, moon, and stars in the firmament??? 

Well, I guess so!

Anyway . . . . 

Here is what the heavens and earth would look like as depicted in the Genesis account of the creation!

Yeah! This is a rather retarded concept of the heavens and earth as depicted in Genesis! I even felt stupid designing this graphic for this article! I think I'm gonna up-chuck! 

Cough! Cough! Choke! Gag! Puke! Puke!

Notice the waters of the deep. Although, it's not mentioned in the creation account, it will play a crucial role later on when we will be debunking the flood of Noah's Ark, because it mentions that the "fountains of the deep" were broken up and the "windows of heaven" were opened, thus causing the great Genesis flood.

But, we'll get to that later. For now . . . let us continue with the Genesis account of the creation. OK?

Also, the Bible describes the sun as the greater light and the moon as the lesser light, but again, that is wrong! Yes, the sun does give off it's own light. But . . . the noon is not a light, like the sun is. The moon gives off no light of it's own, but rather, it shines by reflecting the light of the sun.

Yeah! It's still only the fourth day, and already, the Bible continues to fuck it up!

Anyway . . . to continue . . .

20 And God said, Let the waters bring forth abundantly the moving creature that hath life, and fowl that may fly above the earth in the open firmament of heaven. 21 And God created great whales, and every living creature that moveth, which the waters brought forth abundantly, after their kind, and every winged fowl after his kind: and God saw that it was good. 22 And God blessed them, saying, Be fruitful, and multiply, and fill the waters in the seas, and let fowl multiply in the earth. 23 And the evening and the morning were the fifth day.

Well . . . . . OK! Here the sequential order is somewhat correct. Life did appear in the seas before life made it's first appearance on the land, and of course, plants did appear on the land before life began to emerge out of the sea. Yes . . . sometimes the Bible might get a couple of small details right. 

But then . . . . .  even a broken clock gives the correct time twice each day!

So . . . The Bible is just another broken clock! A broken coo coo clock!

Oh! And a couple of more little details the Bible got WRONG!!! The great whales evolved, yes EVOLVED from land animals, mammals, that eventually went back to the sea. Also, early life had developed in the seas as micro-organisms before plants even appeared on the land.

So, the Broken Clock Bible fucks up again!


But . . . lets continue . . .

24 And God said, Let the earth bring forth the living creature after his kind, cattle, and creeping thing, and beast of the earth after his kind: and it was so. 25 And God made the beast of the earth after his kind, and cattle after their kind, and every thing that creepeth upon the earth after his kind: and God saw that it was good. 26 And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth. 27 So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them. 28 And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth. 29 And God said, Behold, I have given you every herb bearing seed, which is upon the face of all the earth, and every tree, in the which is the fruit of a tree yielding seed; to you it shall be for meat. 30 And to every beast of the earth, and to every fowl of the air, and to every thing that creepeth upon the earth, wherein there is life, I have given every green herb for meat: and it was so. 31 And God saw every thing that he had made, and, behold, it was very good. And the evening and the morning were the sixth day.

Well . . . I got to wonder . . . if I'm made in the image of God, then . . . God must be fat and bald just like me, and smokes some really great big fat cigars, and also a big pipe! 

Yeah! The big fat guy in the sky!

M82 - The Cigar Galaxy

Hmmmmm! Dose God smoke one of these? OK! I'm just kidding around!

Also, imagine the creator of the universe having to take a snoozer on the seventh day, having to rest after all of his work creating the heavens and the earth. Yeah! The God of the BUY-BULL must be a real wuss if he has to rest after making everything. You would think, that an infinite deity who could create such a vast universe with billions and billions of galaxies having trillions and trillions of stars all shinning by nuclear fusion, that such a cosmic deity who lives for all eternity would never tire. DAMN! What a wuss he must be! Awe! Poor baby! Now he must go beddy-by! Yeah! This Bible God sounds like a real wuss! A real pussy boy!

And further more . . . . . the creation of heavens and the earth in just six days sounds rather like a slapped-together rush-job! I wonder if God had to use duct tape to hold it all together! 

Nah! I'm just kidding around! Astronomers know how the universe got started and how it evolved down through the many billions of years (about 13.8 billion years) and that it wasn't all made by some invisible baby-killing bearded old magic man in the sky!  

OK, my dear passengers, before we go on to the Biblical chapter about Noah's Ark and the great Genesis Flood, it's time for a music break. OK?

So, join us in the entertainment coach and and let's have some fun, singing along, while the train is swaying and rocking to the gentle beat of the rhythm of the rails. Trains are more than just transportation for hauling passengers and freight, ya know. Trains are also . . . in a way . . . actually the worlds largest musical instruments, when you think about it.

Your God Is An Asshole God! 

Music and lyrics by Auntie Diluvian

This video was up-loaded by Godless Geezer!

His YouTube channel is at . . . . . 


Long ago, a former YouTuber called AuntieDiluvian posted a song titled “Your God Is an Asshole God” a parody of “Awesome God” by Rich Mullins. I now resurrect the song with new graphics. (Godless Geezer)

And now . . . the train conductor will lead us all as we sing to the following lyrics. 
Here are the lyrics posted for all to see as you sing along.

Your God Is An Asshole God

An invention of man kind,
that is entirely obsolete.
God is and asshole God!

So, they gather in the churches
and they preach it in the street.
Your God is an asshole God!

It's time to face the facts
that your Bible's just some stories
that were written to impose
a rule of greed and fear!

The deity depicted is a monster
and a coward!
God is an asshole God!

Your God is an asshole God
of fear, lies and cruelty!
A blight on the human race!
God is an asshole God!

Your God is an asshole God
of fear, lies and cruelty!
A blight on the human race!
God is an asshole God!

A moronic deity who sacrificed his son!
God is an asshole God!

To make himself feel better
for the things that HE had done!
God is an asshole God!

And yet they want us all to think
that we're gonna burn forever, for failing
to believe in these absurdities!

Let's help them learn the truth
so we can sing this song together.
God is an asshole God!

Your God is an awful God
of fear, lies and cruelty!
A blight on the human race!
God is an asshole God!

Your God is an asshole God
of fear, lies and cruelty!
A blight on the human race!
God is an asshole God!

Your God is an awful God
of fear, lies and cruelty!
A blight on the human race!
God is an asshole God!

Your God is an asshole God
of fear, lies and cruelty!
A blight on the human race!
God is an asshole God!

Yeah! This young lady, she's really sweet! I dearly love her singing

Anyway . . . . .

We shall now continue our Bible study on Noah's Ark and the Genesis flood.

If you don't know already, you will all learn just exactly what a douche-bag the Bible God really is. Of course most of you probable know it, or have suspected it all along. The next chapter in Genesis is a prime example of how God kills the innocent along with the guilty. Yeah! He's a real douche-bag and an asshole!

So, we will skip ahead, past Adam and Eve, and all that fucking and begatting down through the generations. We will skip ahead to Genesis Chapter Six.

Here we go!

Genesis Chapter 6

1 And it came to pass, when men began to multiply on the face of the earth, and daughters were born unto them, 2 That the sons of God saw the daughters of men that they were fair; and they took them wives of all which they chose. 3 And the LORD said, My spirit shall not always strive with man, for that he also is flesh: yet his days shall be an hundred and twenty years. 4 There were giants in the earth in those days; and also after that, when the sons of God came in unto the daughters of men, and they bare children to them, the same became mighty men which were of old, men of renown. 5 And GOD saw that the wickedness of man was great in the earth, and that every imagination of the thoughts of his heart was only evil continually. 6 And it repented the LORD that he had made man on the earth, and it grieved him at his heart.

Oh! So now God is sorry that he created us! Eh? I really can't believe that EVERY person on the planet had become evil. Sure, there are societies and even nations that have become morally corrupt. Of course, the corrupt kings and dictators usually get over-thrown. But look at the churches. Prime example would be the Catholic church, the Pope (the poop) all those cardinals, butt-banging bishops, and pedophile priests. They're definitely evil and morally corrupt. But, you can't blame all of the average run-of-the-mill Catholics, their families, and children. Oh! And let's not forget our own Republican party here in the United States. Now, there's just all kinds of wrong going on there! But does the entire country deserve to be destroyed because of some morally corrupts idiots at the top trying to run everything? So, the Bible God is now saying that he's sorry that he's made everything. 

OK, now, I don't know what this is about there being giants in the world back then. There is absolutely no paleontological evidence of there ever having been a race of giants. Yes, a few very rare skeletons of some unusually tall individuals have been found by paleontologists and geologists while digging up fossils. There are some people more than 7 feet tall today. But there is NOTHING to indicate that there was ever a race of giants. That is just made-up BULLSHIT in the BUY-BULL!!!

But let's continue . . .

7 And the LORD said, I will destroy man whom I have created from the face of the earth; both man, and beast, and the creeping thing, and the fowls of the air; for it repenteth me that I have made them.

This is the part where the Bible God gets butt-hurt, then he throws a temper tantrum and threatens to kill everybody, and every living thing on the planet, and break stuff! 


8 But Noah found grace in the eyes of the LORD. 9 These are the generations of Noah: Noah was a just man and perfect in his generations, and Noah walked with God. 10 And Noah begat three sons, Shem, Ham, and Japheth. 11 The earth also was corrupt before God, and the earth was filled with violence. 12 And God looked upon the earth, and, behold, it was corrupt; for all flesh had corrupted his way upon the earth. 13 And God said unto Noah, The end of all flesh is come before me; for the earth is filled with violence through them; and, behold, I will destroy them with the earth.

Oh! So, old man Noah was the only goody-goody-two-shoes in this here drama! Let me guess . . .  every man, women, and child was corrupt, including little new born babies? Right? So, even innocent little babies, and innocent little children are to be killed off? Yeah! Punish the innocent along with the guilty! Yeah! Uh huh! That's the ticket! 

14 Make thee an ark of gopher wood; rooms shalt thou make in the ark, and shalt pitch it within and without with pitch. 15 And this is the fashion which thou shalt make it of: The length of the ark shall be three hundred cubits, the breadth of it fifty cubits, and the height of it thirty cubits. 16 A window shalt thou make to the ark, and in a cubit shalt thou finish it above; and the door of the ark shalt thou set in the side thereof; with lower, second, and third stories shalt thou make it. 

This is the part where God says to Noah . . . GOPHER WOOD!!! Yeah! Go fer wood! Go for wood! Ya get it? Yeah I know! Bad joke! So, sue me!

17 And, behold, I, even I, do bring a flood of waters upon the earth, to destroy all flesh, wherein is the breath of life, from under heaven; and every thing that is in the earth shall die. 

Oh gee! What an absolute unmitigated prick this Bible God is! So, he's gonna kill even all the animals, including cute little puppy dogs and cute furry little kittens! Yeah! EVERYTHING MUST GO! Yeah, uh huh! Sounds to me like good ol' Noah got in on God's great big clearance sale.  

The Bible God is a real prick!!!
18 But with thee will I establish my covenant; and thou shalt come into the ark, thou, and thy sons, and thy wife, and thy sons' wives with thee. 19 And of every living thing of all flesh, two of every sort shalt thou bring into the ark, to keep them alive with thee; they shall be male and female. 20 Of fowls after their kind, and of cattle after their kind, of every creeping thing of the earth after his kind, two of every sort shall come unto thee, to keep them alive. 21 And take thou unto thee of all food that is eaten, and thou shalt gather it to thee; and it shall be for food for thee, and for them. 22 Thus did Noah; according to all that God commanded him, so did he.

So! I guess we are supposed  to believe that Noah and his three sons traveled all over the world to bring back polar bears from the Arctic, penguins from the Antarctic, and kangaroos and cute little  koala bears from Australia! Oh really???

Also, let's not forget . . . many Christian Fundamentalists and also many Christian Republican retards expect us to believe that Noah and his three sons put saddles on dinosaurs and rode them back to the ark! Right? Oh really???

Yeah! Like, we know! We know! We get it! We get it!

Well . . . . . . .

Lets continue with the next chapter of the BUY-BULL!!!

Genesis Chapter 7

1 And the LORD said unto Noah, Come thou and all thy house into the ark; for thee have I seen righteous before me in this generation. 2 Of every clean beast thou shalt take to thee by sevens, the male and his female: and of beasts that are not clean by two, the male and his female. 3 Of fowls also of the air by sevens, the male and the female; to keep seed alive upon the face of all the earth. 4 For yet seven days, and I will cause it to rain upon the earth forty days and forty nights; and every living substance that I have made will I destroy from off the face of the earth. 

Oh! Goody goody! So, Noah has about seven days to send his three sons all over the earth to bring back all kinds of animals! How very nice of God to give them a week to accomplish their task! Eh?

But, instead of God causing it to rain for forty days and forty nights, he could have saved a lot of water by just making it rain for, like, say . . . twenty days and twenty nights, and waiting for all the sewers to back up! Yeah! That's the ticket! Way to go God, ya fucking douche-bag!

Anyway . . . let us continue . . .

5 And Noah did according unto all that the LORD commanded him. 6 And Noah was six hundred years old when the flood of waters was upon the earth. 7 And Noah went in, and his sons, and his wife, and his sons' wives with him, into the ark, because of the waters of the flood. 8 Of clean beasts, and of beasts that are not clean, and of fowls, and of every thing that creepeth upon the earth, 9 There went in two and two unto Noah into the ark, the male and the female, as God had commanded Noah. 10 And it came to pass after seven days, that the waters of the flood were upon the earth. 11 In the six hundredth year of Noah's life, in the second month, the seventeenth day of the month, the same day were all the fountains of the great deep broken up, and the windows of heaven were opened. 12 And the rain was upon the earth forty days and forty nights. 

OK, here the Bible contradicts itself. Recall back in Genesis Chapter 6 Verse 3 where God says . . . 

And the LORD said, My spirit shall not always strive with man, for that he also is flesh: yet his days shall be an hundred and twenty years.

Way, way, way back then, at the beginning, people were said to have lived over 900 years. Now, here it says that Noah was 600 years old, while at the same time, God says that people would only live 120 years. Really???

So God! Which is it? Come on Dude! Why all the inconsistencies? Like, get with the program! OK?

Anyway . . . Now we have come to the part where it said . . . 

In the six hundredth year of Noah's life, in the second month, the seventeenth day of the month, the same day were all the fountains of the great deep broken up, and the windows of heaven were opened.

OK, now we come to the part about how the "fountains of the deep" were broken up and how the "windows of heaven" were opened.

And so, we will come to the so-called Hydro-plate and Ice or Water Canopy hypothesis as proposed by Christian Fundamentalist, "Dr." Walt Brown, and serve his bitch-ass up to him on a silver platter! 

Uh . . . excuse me . . . but, did I say "Dr." Walt Brown? Well . . . if he does have a PhD it is probably in Post-hole Digging! If he's a "Doctor" then I'm King Kong in a fur coat, and I have the Empire State Building in my left hip pocket! Doctor??? Indeed!!! He's a quack! Even ducks think he's a quack!

So, from now on, instead of calling him "Doctor" I'll just refer to him as Walt Brown or WB.

Anyway . . . . . according to his Hydro-plate "theory" he proposes that before the Genesis flood, there was a layer of water between the earth's crust and the mantel, and that above the earth, there was a spherical "canopy" of either water or ice, and when the floods came, there were fractures in the earth's crust and the water below the crust, being under high pressure, spewed forth from the fractures, thus, the "fountains of the deep" were broken up, and the water canopy above the earth came down as heavy rains, thus, the "windows of heaven" were opened, and thereby causing the world-wide flood. Oh really???

Yeah! Like, we're suppose to believe that rock can float on top of water, and ice, or a thick spherical layer of liquid water can just hover above the earth! Are we really suppose to believe that?

Anyway . . . just for now . . . we'll let the Bible finish what it has to say, before we go on to describe Walt Brown's cockamamie "theory" in more detail.     

13 In the selfsame day entered Noah, and Shem, and Ham, and Japheth, the sons of Noah, and Noah's wife, and the three wives of his sons with them, into the ark; 

So, there is to be only eight survivors after the upcoming flood, Noah and his wife, his three sons and their wives, a total of eight people who are going to repopulate the earth.

Well . . . . . good luck with that! With only four men and four women, there is going to be a lot inbreeding and down-breeding and cousin-lovin' going on! 

 Hey boys and girls! Can you say . . . . . INCEST???

Also, with only two of each kind of animal on board the arc, there will be a whole lot of in-breeding and down-breeding long after the flood. This would result in genetically inherited deformities.

Yeah! Like, good luck with that! 

Anyway . . . we'll let the Bible say some more . . . for now. 

14 They, and every beast after his kind, and all the cattle after their kind, and every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth after his kind, and every fowl after his kind, every bird of every sort. 15 And they went in unto Noah into the ark, two and two of all flesh, wherein is the breath of life. 16 And they that went in, went in male and female of all flesh, as God had commanded him: and the LORD shut him in. 17 And the flood was forty days upon the earth; and the waters increased, and bare up the ark, and it was lift up above the earth. 18 And the waters prevailed, and were increased greatly upon the earth; and the ark went upon the face of the waters. 19 And the waters prevailed exceedingly upon the earth; and all the high hills, that were under the whole heaven, were covered. 20 Fifteen cubits upward did the waters prevail; and the mountains were covered. 

Sorry Bible (no I'm not sorry!) but I have to interrupt you for a moment. 

So, the waters only had to rise about 15 cubits before the mountains were covered? Really???

A cubit is 18 inches, therefore 15 cubits would be  22 and-a-half feet. So . . . are we to believe that there were no really high mountains before the flood? Well . . . . . yes, I guess! According to some Christian Fundamentalist beliefs, after the "fountains of the deep" were broken up, the earth's crust buckled and folded causing the mountains to be pushed up much higher, and the oceans became deeper as a result, thus, the waters eventually abated from all the land areas.

Oh! How convenient!!!

OK, mountains are actually caused by the folding and buckling of the earth's crust. But, this is naturally due to the shifting and movement of plate tectonics which sometimes causes earthquakes. The earth's crust is divided or broken by fault lines. But, this has been going on for the past 4.5 billion years. So, there has always been high mountain ranges on the earth, long long long before the so-called Genesis flood which was supposed to have occurred about 4,500 years ago, which of course, it did not! The global flood is just some stupid fairy tale that only Christian retards could possibly believe in!

OK, Bible . . . we'll let you speak some more! 

21 And all flesh died that moved upon the earth, both of fowl, and of cattle, and of beast, and of every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth, and every man: 22 All in whose nostrils was the breath of life, of all that was in the dry land, died. 23 And every living substance was destroyed which was upon the face of the ground, both man, and cattle, and the creeping things, and the fowl of the heaven; and they were destroyed from the earth: and Noah only remained alive, and they that were with him in the ark. 24 And the waters prevailed upon the earth an hundred and fifty days.

Thus, concludes our little Bible study, because, this is the end of the chapter.

OK, Bible . . . you can shut up now! OK? We've heard quite enough from you already! OK? 


BAD BIBLE! BAD BIBLE! Naughty naughty! (spank! spank! spank!)

OK, my dear passengers, now that our little Bible study has concluded, the train conductor will be passing out some flat wooden paddles to everyone here, and we will now spank our naughty Bibles! After we have spanked our Bibles, the conductor will collect the Bibles and the paddles after we have finished. Yes, on this train we do keep a collection of Bible for the purpose of debunkary, and we also have a rather extensive collection of science books. So, we just keep the Bibles around for laughs! 


I am ABSOLUTELY against corporal punishment of children. It should NEVER be allowed in our public schools, and I'm even against parents using corporal punishment in the home. Corporal punishment should be outlawed in all states in the USA! Sometime, corporal punishment has been known to go way way way beyond a mere swat on the butt with the hand, to children having been beaten to death! Corporal punishment has NEVER done any good. Any adult who harms a child, that person should be put, not IN jail, but UNDER the jail, and locked up so far away where they can't even hear the dogs barking!  

Anyway . . . moving on back to our topic . . . . . 

And now . . . . . my dear passengers, if you all will please join me in the entertainment coach, you might want to watch this following video. It's a little over an hour long.

The Bloody Bible

 TTA Podcast 78

This is from a TTA Podcast produced by The Thinking Atheist. 

This was published on October 30,2012

I hope you all enjoy this video, and perhaps learn something from it.

And after you all have seen the above video, we shall continue on with our topic.

OK . . . . . in addition to the problem we have with the layer of water that was supposed to have existed between the earth's crust and the really hot hot hot mantle below, there is also a another really big problem with the water or ice "canopy" that was supposed to have existed high above and all around the earth.

But . . . let's continue . . . with the hydro-plate hypothesis some more.

And now, I shall quote form the following article at Rational Wiki which is another website encyclopedia  similar to Wikipedia. Both are excellent online encyclopedias.

Here is the link to said website . . . . .


And here is it, quoted in this blog . . .

Hydroplate theory

Hydroplate theory is a creationist hypothesis that Earth once had huge chambers of water sandwiched between the earth's crust and its mantle. It was invented solely to explain the question "Where did the water for the great flood come from?" (The obvious answer, that a god capable of creating the universe in a single week can conjure the requisite water out of thin air, was apparently not up for consideration.) It was first proposed in 1980 by Walter Brown (holder of a PhD in mechanical engineering).

According to Brown, before the Flood, the Earth's crust floated on a thick layer of water, above the mantle. Walls and tendrils connected the mantle and crust, allowing the inner and outer reaches of the planet to rotate on its axis at the same speed.

But the fantasy does not stop there; according to this "theory" antediluvian Earth had one super-continent — similar in concept to, but not the same as, Pangaea — that covered about 75 percent of the surface. Oceans, if you could call them that, were really giant lakes (like the Sea of Galilee, the Red Sea, etc.). To maintain consistency they are obliged to argue that Earth's mountains rarely reached more than 5000 feet (1524 meters) above what was then sea level and the highest mountain was probably much lower than 9000 feet (2743 meters). 

How the "Great Flood" occurred

When it came time to flood Earth, God cracked the crust, releasing the water (like a soft-boiled egg). These cracks formed underwater mountain ranges like the Mid-Atlantic Ridge. The subterranean water sprayed upward with such great force that it caused worldwide rainfall for 40 days and 40 nights (and made the comets, and anything else they don't understand). The water left its subterranean encasements so quickly that many land masses immediately began to sink. These rapidly sinking land masses uplifted other land masses, thus causing deep-sea fossils to appear at the tops of mountain peaks. (Creationists always point to "mountaintop fossils" as proof of the flood — naturally wanting to wish away the vast amount of evidence for slow-motion tectonic forces taking millions of years to raise mountains from the ocean floor.)

Results of the Flood

The proponents of this pseudoscience claim that many of the sunken land masses remain sunken today, forming the world's ocean floors. All of these sudden movements caused the super-continent to develop tectonic ridges and mountain ranges that run parallel to Earth's coastlines. These movements also created, in the eyes of creationists, an illusion that led scientists to develop the theory of Pangaea.

The ocean floors took less than six months to sink to their current depths. The flood waters then filled these troughs, creating the oceans and drying out the deluged land.

This theory is also being prepared as a pre-emptive strike against any living microbes that might be found on Mars or other parts of our solar system. Creationists are claiming that some mud might have gone flying out into space, and landed on another planet. 

Biblical origins

This theory rests upon four meager verses of the Bible: Genesis 7:2-3 and Genesis 7:11-12. (No, seriously. This is the entire basis of the theory.)

Genesis 7:11-12
In the six hundredth year of Noah's life, in the second month, the seventeenth day of the month, the same day were all the fountains of the great deep broken up, and the windows of heaven were opened. And the rain was upon the earth forty days and forty nights.

Genesis 7:2-3
Of every clean beast thou shalt take to thee by sevens, the male and his female: and of beasts that are not clean by two, the male and his female. Of fowls also of the air by sevens, the male and the female; to keep seed alive upon the face of all the earth.


Oh! So "Doctor" Walter Brown actually does have a PhD! But it's only a PhD in mechanical engineering. OK . . . one can be a Christian Fundamentalist and a Creationst, and still be a really good mechanical engineer, or an electrical engineer, or a skilled auto mechanic, or an X-ray technician, or a radiologist, or even a good dentist or a good medical doctor. We get that! But, his PhD has nothing to do with the hard sciences, but only with mechanical engineering.

Also . . . to be any of the above, you don't have to know anything about the hard sciences, like, astronomy or astrophysics or geology or paleontology or  biology, or even EVOLUTION!!! OK, we get that! 

But . . . if you're in a medical field like pharmacology or epidemiology, having to do with medicines and diseases, and developing new drugs or antibiotics, you do have to know about biology and EVOLUTION!!! That is because, bacteria and viruses over time develop a resistance to antibiotics or vaccines, which is why new vaccines have to be developed every year for new strains of the flu, or whatever new disease happens  to come along during any particular year. That's because viruses and bacteria EVOLVE, and quite rapidly. So, when you're in any medical field of this sort, you do have to understand something about biology and EVOLUTION!!! Ya, get it? Ya fucking Christian Fundamentalist retards!

And finally . . . if you don't know shit about any of these hard sciences, then you have no business calling yourself a scientist, and you have no business wearing a white lab coat like a scientist. 

In fact . . . I think you should be arrested for impersonating a scientist! Really! If I were to don a policeman's uniform and a badge, and I went out into the streets writing tickets and trying to make an arrest, I could get busted and thrown in jail for impersonating a cop. 

So, you should get busted and thrown in jail for impersonating a scientist if you're seen in a white lab coat. You have no business wearing the white lab coat, unless . . . you are a student in a classroom where you are learning biology, chemistry, or physics. Then only in the lab do your wear the white coat. Also, if you are doctor or a dentist you can wear the white coat. Of course,  in the hospitals these days, they've gone from white to either blue or green.

Naturally of course . . . I seriously doubt if such a law can ever be implemented. So, this is just my own personnel opinion on the matter.

Actually, I think quack-doc Wally Brown-nose should be busted for impersonating a human being!

End of story!!!  

Anyway . . . . .

We shall now go on to the so-called ice canopy or vapor canopy hypothesis. 

Here is an article from TalkOrigins concerning the "vapor canopy" hypothesis, and why it is invalid, and just another raft of BULLSHIT!!!


Again, I shall quote from said article


The Vapor Canopy Hypothesis 
Holds No Water
Paul Farrar
Bill Hyde

The Vapor Canopy Hypothesis Holds No Water
By Paul Farrar

In this short and, I hope, simple note I will discuss the physical implications of the often proposed "vapor canopy" explanation for the source of water for Noah's Flood as recorded in "Genesis".

Noah's Flood is alleged to have covered the mountains of the earth to a depth of 15 cubits (about 8 meters). To have covered Mt. Everest it would have required a depth of water of about 9km above sea level. If the flood was only required to cover the mountains in Urartu (Ararat), where Noah's boat is said to have settled, about 5km of water would be needed.

The "vapor canopy hypothesis" states that before the flood, the water existed in the atmosphere as water vapor. The flood occurred when this vapor condensed and fell as rain, flooding the earth. The flood subsided later, various explanations being given for where all that water went.

First, let us look at atmospheric pressure. For the earth's atmosphere, the pressure is almost exactly hydrostatic, since it is held to the earth by gravity and velocities are too low to significantly change the pressure. In plain language this means that the air pressure at any point is equal to the weight of the air in a unit area column above that point. At sea level, air pressure in US engineering units is about 14.5 pounds/sq inch because a column of air one inch square extending to the top of the atmosphere weighs (Guess what!?) 14.5 pounds. On top of Mt. Everest, the pressure is lower because the lowest and densest 9km of the atmosphere is below that point.

Now the "vapor canopy" would form a part of the atmosphere, being a body of gas (water vapor) gravitationally held to the earth. It would in fact be most of the pre-flood atmosphere. There would have to be enough vapor to form 9km of liquid, when condensed, and, therefore the vapor would weigh as much as 9km of water. The pressure at the earth's surface, where Noah and family lived, would be equal to one atmosphere PLUS the weight of a 9km column of water of unit area. This is equivalent to the pressure 9km deep in the ocean. What is this pressure? Well, each 10 meters of water is roughly equivalent to one atmosphere, so the pressure would be 900 atmospheres. The atmosphere would also have a composition of about 900 parts water vapor to one part of what we call air today.

How could an atmosphere almost 100% water vapor not condense? The temperature would have to be raised to the point where the partial pressure of water equals 900 atmospheres, i.e. the boiling point at that pressure. So we find Noah et al. living in a 13,000psi boiler. Is this credible?

The Vapor Canopy Hypothesis Holds No Water
By Bill Hyde

Someone writes:

"Radiocarbon" does not form from cosmic rays, the carbon-14 drops in from the sky itself.

C-14 forms in the reaction:

N-14 + neutron --> C-14 + H

Where the free neutrons are generally produced by cosmic rays. So the canopy-promoting Jehovah's Witnesses are correct that such a canopy would foul up C-14 dating. However, it would also have many other effects, none of which are observed. I would add:

Such a canopy would have a serious effect on solar and thermal radiation. Just exactly how this would affect the climate depends on the canopy's thickness, but it is unlikely to have no effect. No such effect is evident in the paleoclimatic record.

As well as dendrochronology, thermoluminescence dating, fission track dating, amino-acid dating, and uranium/thorium dating confirm C-14 dates for humans at the last ice age (i.e. about 21,000 years ago for the glacial maximum) within 20%. If the canopy had existed up to 4,000 years ago this would not be the case since all of the above, with the possible exception of thermoluminescence dating, are unaffected by the presence or absence of cosmic rays.

 If there was very little C-14 production before 4000 B.P. and normal production since, no objects would carbon date between 4,000 and about 20,000 years old. This is not what is observed.


So, now we know that BOTH the Hydro-plate hypothesis AND the vapor canopy hypothesis are complete and total BULLSHIT!!!

OK, before we go on any further about the vapor canopy hypothesis, we shall get back again to the hydro-plate hypothesis. Let's examine this in more detail.

But first . . . here is some more information about the real conditions inside the real earth, concerning the temperature of the mantle, the outer core, and the inner core of the earth.

Check out this next graphic below!!!

Sooooooo!!! As you all can plainly see . . . the Upper Mantle just below the earth's crust can reach temperatures of about 3,600° Fahrenheit. WOW! That bitch, she's really hot! Eh? Oh! And the earth's crust is about 30 miles thick on average, and about 35 miles thick where the mountain ranges are located. But, it is only about 5 miles thick at the bottoms of the deepest oceans.

The earth has four layers; the lighter layers are on the surface, while the heavier layers are in the center. It is believed that the heavier materials sank in deeper as the earth was cooling and forming. The layers are referred to as the crust, the upper mantle, the lower mantle and the core.

The crust

Mainly comprised of basaltic rocks and granite, the crust is only a few miles thick. It is between three to five miles thick under the ocean and up to 25 miles thick under the continents. The crust is flexible and is broken up into plates that are able to shift. As the crust floats on top of the mantle, it can sometimes stick and then snap forward, causing earthquakes. The temperature of the crust at the earth's surface, where we all reside, is about the same temperature as the air we breath. But, at its deepest level, the crust temperature is at 1,600 degrees Fahrenheit. The continental crust, located under the landmasses of earth, is mostly made of granite. Under the oceans, the crust is made up of volcanic lava rock, also known as basalt. Because the basalt is heavier and denser, the continental crust rides on top of the oceanic crust. Volcanoes create new layers of the crust each year.

The upper and lower mantle

Made of hot rocks, the mantle is over 1,800 miles thick. The earth's crust floats on top of it. The temperature of the mantle varies from 3,600 degrees Fahrenheit to 4,500 degrees Fahrenheit. The variation in temperature is what causes the mantle to flow in convection currents as the hot material rises to the top, displacing the cooler materials. The lithosphere is the area that combines the upper level of the mantle and the crust. Made of brittle rock, it sits on top of the asthenosphere. It is thought that the asthenosphere is partially molten, so it can flow, causing the plates of the crust to move. The Upper mantle is made of silicon, magnesium, oxygen, iron, calcium and aluminum. The lower mantle is made of a crystalline form of olivine and pyroxene, which are made up of the elements magnesium, iron and silica. 

The core

The core of the earth is the hottest layer. The temperatures in the outer core range from 6,800 to 10,800 degrees Fahrenheit. Made up of melted metals like iron and nickel, the outer core begins 1,800 miles below the crust and extends for 1,400 miles. Inside the inner core, the temperature is about 10,800 degrees Fahrenheit. Yes! Hotter than the surface of the sun! Pressures in the core are 45 million pounds per square inch; this is three million times the pressure at sea level. The inner core is 800 miles thick and the metals here are compressed by the pressure and do not move around as liquids do. Instead, they move as if they were a solid and are only able to vibrate.

OK, now back to Doctor Quack Quack Walter Brown's Hydro-plate Hypothesis . . .

Uh . . . what was that the Bible said about the "fountains of the deep" being broken up???

According to The Quack, when the "fountains of the deep" were broken up, it was caused by fractures in the earth's crust, which was floating on the waters of the deep. If this were so, then Noah and his family would had had a Hell of a lot more to worry about than a global flood. 

Here is another graphic of the hydro-plate Hypothesis. Actually . . . two somewhat different versions.

OK, now picture this following scenario . . . we have this hot hot really hot Upper Mantle at about  3,600 degrees Fahrenheit, and on top of that, we have a layer of water, the "waters of the deep" now bubbling and boiling at super hot temperatures! The tremendous pressure would cause many fractures in the earth's crust, and it would not just be only hot water, but rather, super-heated steam rising up into the earth's atmosphere all over the world and causing global temperatures to rise to several hundred degrees Fahrenheit. Noah and his family would have been boiled alive from the intense heat. They would have been toast! WOW! Talk about global warming!!! Eh? The oceans would have become boiling hot fish soup! Yeah! Fish chowder! But, sorry to say, not very appetizing at that, either. Yuck!!!

OK, Naturally . . . there are some rather large underground caverns, within the earth's crust, and some are even filled with water. So, there are underground lakes and streams, but again . . . only within the the earth's crust. But . . . there were no subterranean water chambers between the crust and the hot mantle below, and no pillar-like structures connecting the crust to the mantle. And yes, there are underground aquifers where wells are drilled to bring water up from underground. But no so-called waters of the great deep between the crust and mantle from which the so-called fountains of the deep were supposed to have spewed forth.  

So, there is no deep deep deep layer of water between the earth's crust and the hot mantle below. Because, if there was (which of course, there wasn't) there would be no way the earths crust can float on top of the so-called waters of the deep, as mentioned in the fucking BUY-BULL! 

And NO! Not even if there were pillar-like structures (which again, of course, there isn't) to support sections of the earth's crust (as depicted in the graphic above on the right) because again, if there was, all those subterranean chambers would have to be really huge, all filled with super heated water, and of course . . . those sections of the earth's crust would collapse, releasing super heated steam up into the earth's atmosphere.

OK, the average density of the earth's crust is about 3 grams per cubic centimeter, and of course, the density of water is lower than the density of rock, being only 1 gram per cubic centimeter. 

Here is a chart of the average density of each layer inside the earth.

As you can see . . . as you go deeper and deeper down inside the earth, the density of the earth's layers increases, the material becoming more tightly compacted the deeper you go. Again, as I have said earlier, the earth's crust has an average density of 3 grams per cubic centimeter. Actually, as indicated by the chart above, the density of the earth's crust is between 2.2 to 2.9 almost 3 grams per cubic centimeter.

Ah! But water only has a density of 1 gram per cubic centimeter. Therefore, the materials making up the earth's crust has a higher density than water. Another words, a cup full of materials taken from the earth's crust would be almost three times as heavy as a cup full of water.

So . . . when was the last time you have ever seen a rock floating on water? Yeah! Christian Fundamentalist retards, like, Walt Brown, expect us all to believe that the rocky earth's crust can float on top of water! 

Oh! Really???

Walt Brown's hydro-plate "theory" is just . . . . . . . FUCKING RETARDED!!! 

Now, the hot hot mantle below the crust has an average higher density than the crust. The mantle is semi-liquid, a rather thick gooey slow moving liquid, so that the lower density crust with it's plate tectonics can float on top of that. But again, rock can not float on top of water! Ya got that? Ya Christian Fundamentalist RETARDS!

OK, ya fundies! Here's the deal . . . . . 

If any of you can find me a rock that floats on water, I will give you $100 dollars for it. No fake rocks that are hollow inside! OK? You have to go out and look for rocks that can float on top of water.   

Anyway . . . scientists all know, for a scientific fact, that there is simply not enough water, on or in the earth, and not enough water vapor in the earth's atmosphere to flood the entire  planet all the way up to the highest mountains. During the past 4 billion years there have been many periods of climate change, periods of global warming and ice ages, and sea levels have resin and fallen over and over again and again over the eons during periods of global warming, and ice ages. But, NEVER more than a hundred meters. During ice ages, sea levels are at their lowest.

For over 160 million years, when the dinosaurs ruled the earth, the carbon dioxides (CO2) levels were much higher than it is now. The earth had mostly tropical climate and there were no polar ice caps. The earth was simply too warm for polar ice caps or snow caps on the mountain tops to exist. Ocean levels were at their highest. But even then, there were obviously still large continents.  When the oceans are at there highest level, it is never high enough to flood the entire globe. Only about a hundred meters higher than it is at the present time. And that's it! 

Back in the age of the dinosaurs, and until about 60 million years ago when the dinosaurs finally became extinct, the earth was much warmer, and sea levels were higher (about a hundred meters higher) than now, and there was more CO2 in the atmosphere. And since then, we had a few ace ages when CO2 levels were much lower. Also, during the ice ages, ocean levels are lower.

But now, because of industrial pollution, we humans have caused CO2 levels to increase again. Back in 2013, CO2 levels have gone up to about 400 parts per million (400 ppm) the highest it as been in the past five million years.

Anyway . . . . . . .

Ocean levels can never get high enough to flood the entire planet, as described in the Genesis flood. Not even now, if we were to completely melt the polar ices caps, all the snow caps on top of the mountains, and every God damn ice cube in all the refrigerators around the world, and pumped all of the water out of the underground aquifers, and dumped the whole she-bang into the sea, the ocean levels would only rise about a hundred meters, which is certainly not high enough to flood the entire earth. There is simply not enough water anywhere on this planet to cause a global flood.  

Now . . . . . getting back to the so-called "fountains of the deep" as mentioned in the BUY-BULL!

Oh! But what about geysers, like, Old Faithful, the geyser in Yellowstone Nation Park? And what about  hydro-thermal vents at the bottom of the oceans? Aren't those the fountains of the deep as mentioned in the Bible? Yeah! What about those?

OK, here is another article from Wikipedia concerning hydro thermal vents at the bottom of the oceans, also known as white smokers and black smokers.

Check this out, from Wikipedia . . . . .

Hydrothermal vent
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

A hydrothermal vent is a fissure in a planet's surface 
from which geothermally heated water issues. Hydrothermal vents are commonly found near volcanically active places, areas where tectonic plates are moving apart, ocean basins, and hotspots. Hydrothermal vents exist because the earth is both geologically active and has large amounts of water on its surface and within its crust. Common land types include hot springs, fumaroles and geysers. Under the sea, hydrothermal vents may form features called black smokers. Relative to the majority of the deep sea, the areas around submarine hydrothermal vents are biologically more productive, often hosting complex communities fueled by the chemicals dissolved in the vent fluids. Chemosynthetic bacteria and archaea form the base of the food chain, supporting diverse organisms, including giant tube worms, clams, limpets and shrimp. Active hydrothermal vents are believed to exist on Jupiter's moon Europa, and ancient hydrothermal vents have been speculated to exist on Mars.

Physical properties

Hydrothermal vents in the deep ocean typically form along the mid-ocean ridges, such as the East Pacific Rise and the Mid-Atlantic Ridge. These are locations where two tectonic plates are diverging and new crust is being formed.

The water that issues from seafloor hydrothermal vents consists mostly of sea water drawn into the hydrothermal system close to the volcanic edifice through faults and porous sediments or volcanic strata, plus some magmatic water released by the upwelling magma. In terrestrial hydrothermal systems, the majority of water circulated within the fumarole and geyser systems is meteoric water plus ground water that has percolated down into the thermal system from the surface, but it also commonly contains some portion of metamorphic water, magmatic water, and sedimentary formational brine that is released by the magma. The proportion of each varies from location to location.

In contrast to the approximately 2°C ambient water temperature at these depths, water emerges from these vents at temperatures ranging from 60 to as high as 464°C. Due to the high hydrostatic pressure at these depths, water may exist in either its liquid form or as a supercritical fluid at such temperatures. The critical point of (pure) water is 375°C at a pressure of 218 atmospheres. At a depth of 3,000 meters, the hydrostatic pressure of sea water is more than 300 atmospheres (as salt water is denser than fresh water). At this depth and pressure, seawater becomes supercritical at a temperature of 407°C. However, the increase in salinity at this depth pushes the water closer to its critical point. Thus, water emerging from the hottest parts of some hydrothermal vents can be a supercritical fluid, possessing physical properties between those of a gas and those of a liquid. Besides being superheated, the water is also extremely acidic, often having a pH value as low as 2.8 – approximately that of vinegar.

Sister Peak (Comfortless Cove Hydrothermal Field, 4°48′S by 12°22′W, elevation -2996 m), Shrimp Farm and Mephisto (Red Lion Hydrothermal Field, 4°48′S by 12°23′W, elevation -3047 m), are three hydrothermal vents of the black smoker category, located on the Mid-Atlantic Ridge near Ascension Island. They are presumed to have been active since an earthquake shook the region in 2002. These vents have been observed to vent phase-separated, vapor-type fluids. In 2008, sustained exit temperatures of up to 407°C were recorded at one of these vents, with a peak recorded temperature of up to 464°C. These thermodynamic conditions exceed the critical point of seawater, and are the highest temperatures recorded to date from the seafloor. This is the first reported evidence for direct magmatic-hydrothermal interaction on a slow-spreading mid-ocean ridge.

The initial stages of a vent chimney begin with the deposition of the mineral anhydrite. Sulfides of copper, iron, and zinc then precipitate in the chimney gaps, making it less porous over the course of time. Vent growths on the order of 30 cm per day have been recorded. An April 2007 exploration of the deep-sea vents off the coast of Fiji found those vents to be a significant source of dissolved iron.

Black smokers and white smokers

Some hydrothermal vents form roughly cylindrical chimney structures. These form from minerals that are dissolved in the vent fluid. When the superheated water contacts the near-freezing sea water, the minerals precipitate out to form particles which add to the height of the stacks. Some of these chimney structures can reach heights of 60 meters. An example of such a towering vent was "Godzilla", a structure in the Pacific Ocean near Oregon that rose to 40 meters before it fell over.

A black smoker or sea vent is a type of hydrothermal vent found on the seabed, typically in the abyssal and hadal zones. They appear as black, chimney-like structures that emit a cloud of black material. Black smokers typically emit particles with high levels of sulfur-bearing minerals, or sulfides. Black smokers are formed in fields hundreds of meters wide when superheated water from below Earth's crust comes through the ocean floor. This water is rich in dissolved minerals from the crust, most notably sulfides. When it comes in contact with cold ocean water, many minerals precipitate, forming a black, chimney-like structure around each vent. The deposited metal sulfides can become massive sulfide ore deposits in time.

Black smokers were first discovered in 1977 on the East Pacific Rise by scientists from Scripps Institution of Oceanography. They were observed using a deep submergence vehicle called ALVIN belonging to the Woods Hole Oceanographic Institution. Now, black smokers are known to exist in the Atlantic and Pacific Oceans, at an average depth of 2100 metres. The most northerly black smokers are a cluster of five named Loki's Castle, discovered in 2008 by scientists from the University of Bergen at 73°N, on the Mid-Atlantic Ridge between Greenland and Norway. These black smokers are of interest as they are in a more stable area of the Earth's crust, where tectonic forces are less and consequently fields of hydrothermal vents are less common. The world's deepest known black smokers are located in the Cayman Trough, 5,000 meters (3.1 miles) below the ocean's surface.

White smoker vents emit lighter-hued minerals, such as those containing barium, calcium and silicon. These vents also tend to have lower temperature plumes.

Biological communities

Life has traditionally been seen as driven by energy from 
the sun, but deep-sea organisms have no access to sunlight, so they must depend on nutrients found in the dusty chemical deposits and hydrothermal fluids in which they live. Previously, benthic oceanographers assumed that vent organisms were dependent on marine snow, as deep-sea organisms are. This would leave them dependent on plant life and thus the sun. Some hydrothermal vent organisms do consume this "rain", but with only such a system, life forms would be very sparse. Compared to the surrounding sea floor, however, hydrothermal vent zones have a density of organisms 10,000 to 100,000 times greater.

Hydrothermal vent communities are able to sustain such vast amounts of life because vent organisms depend on chemosynthetic bacteria for food. The water from the hydrothermal vent is rich in dissolved minerals and supports a large population of chemoautotrophic bacteria. These bacteria use sulfur compounds, particularly hydrogen sulfide, a chemical highly toxic to most known organisms, to produce organic material through the process of chemosynthesis.

The ecosystem so formed is reliant upon the continued existence of the hydrothermal vent field as the primary source of energy, which differs from most surface life on Earth, which is based on solar energy. However, although it is often said that these communities exist independently of the sun, some of the organisms are actually dependent upon oxygen produced by photosynthetic organisms, while others are anaerobic.

The chemosynthetic bacteria grow into a thick mat which attracts other organisms, such as amphipods and copepods, which graze upon the bacteria directly. Larger organisms, such as snails, shrimp, crabs, tube worms, fish, and octopi, form a food chain of predator and prey relationships above the primary consumers. The main families of organisms found around seafloor vents are annelids, pogonophorans, gastropods, and crustaceans, with large bivalves, vestimentiferan worms, and "eyeless" shrimp making up the bulk of nonmicrobial organisms.

Tube worms, which may grow to over two meters tall, form an important part of the community around a hydrothermal vent. They have no mouth or digestive tract, and like parasitic worms, absorb nutrients produced by the bacteria in their tissues. About 285 billion bacteria are found per ounce of tubeworm tissue. Tubeworms have red plumes which contain hemoglobin. Hemoglobin combines with hydrogen sulfide and transfers it to the bacteria living inside the worm. In return, the bacteria nourish the worm with carbon compounds. The two species that inhabit a hydrothermal vent are Tevnia jerichonana, and Riftia pachyptila. One discovered community, dubbed "Eel City", consists predominantly of eels. Though eels are not uncommon, invertebrates typically dominate hydrothermal vents. Eel City is located near Nafanua volcanic cone, American Samoa.

Other examples of the unique fauna which inhabit this ecosystem are the scaly-foot gastropod Crysomallon squamiferum, a species of snail with a foot reinforced by scales made of iron and organic materials, and the Pompeii worm Alvinella pompejana, which is capable of withstanding temperatures up to 80°C (176°F).

In 1993, already more than 100 gastropod species were known to occur in hydrothermal vents. Over 300 new species have been discovered at hydrothermal vents, many of them "sister species" to others found in geographically separated vent areas. It has been proposed that before the North American plate overrode the mid-ocean ridge, there was a single biogeographic vent region found in the eastern Pacific. The subsequent barrier to travel began the evolutionary divergence of species in different locations. The examples of convergent evolution seen between distinct hydrothermal vents is seen as major support for the theory of natural selection and of evolution as a whole.

Although life is very sparse at these depths, black smokers are the centers of entire ecosystems. Sunlight is nonexistent, so many organisms – such as archaea and extremophiles – convert the heat, methane, and sulfur compounds provided by black smokers into energy through a process called chemosynthesis. More complex life forms, such as clams and tubeworms, feed on these organisms. The organisms at the base of the food chain also deposit minerals into the base of the black smoker, therefore completing the life cycle.

A species of phototrophic bacterium has been found living near a black smoker off the coast of Mexico at a depth of 2,500 meters (8,200 ft). No sunlight penetrates that far into the waters. Instead, the bacteria, part of the Chlorobiaceae family, use the faint glow from the black smoker for photosynthesis. This is the first organism discovered in nature to exclusively use a light other than sunlight for photosynthesis.

New and unusual species are constantly being discovered in the neighborhood of black smokers. The Pompeii worm was found in the 1980s, and a scaly-foot gastropod in 2001 during an expedition to the Indian Ocean's Kairei hydrothermal vent field. The latter uses iron sulfides (pyrite and greigite) for the structure of its dermal sclerites (hardened body parts), instead of calcium carbonate. The extreme pressure of 2500 meters of water (approximately 25 megapascals or 250 atmospheres) is thought to play a role in stabilizing iron sulfide for biological purposes. This armor plating probably serves as a defense against the venomous radula (teeth) of predatory snails in that community.

Biological theories

Although the discovery of hydrothermal vents is a relatively recent event in the history of science, the importance of this discovery has given rise to, and supported, new biological and bio-atmospheric theories.

The deep hot biosphere

At the beginning of his 1992 paper The Deep Hot Biosphere, Thomas Gold referred to ocean vents in support of his theory that the lower levels of the earth are rich in living biological material that finds its way to the surface. He further expanded his ideas in the book The Deep Hot Biosphere.

An article on abiogenic hydrocarbon production in the February 2008 issue of Science journal used data from experiments at the Lost City hydrothermal field to report how the abiotic synthesis of low molecular mass hydrocarbons from mantle derived carbon dioxide may occur in the presence of ultramafic rocks, water, and moderate amounts of heat.

Hydrothermal origin of life

Günter Wächtershäuser proposed the iron-sulfur world theory and suggested that life might have originated at hydrothermal vents. Wächtershäuser proposed that an early form of metabolism predated genetics. By metabolism he meant a cycle of chemical reactions that release energy in a form that can be harnessed by other processes.

It has been proposed that amino-acid synthesis could have occurred deep in the Earth's crust and that these amino-acids were subsequently shot up along with hydrothermal fluids into cooler waters, where lower temperatures and the presence of clay minerals would have fostered the formation of peptides and protocells. This is an attractive hypothesis because of the abundance of CH4 (methane) and NH3 (ammonia) present in hydrothermal vent regions, a condition that was not provided by the Earth's primitive atmosphere. A major limitation to this hypothesis is the lack of stability of organic molecules at high temperatures, but some have suggested that life would have originated outside of the zones of highest temperature. There are numerous species of extremophiles and other organisms currently living immediately around deep-sea vents, suggesting that this is indeed a possible scenario.


In 1949, a deep water survey reported anomalously hot brines in the central portion of the Red Sea. Later work in the 1960s confirmed the presence of hot, 60 °C (140 °F), saline brines and associated metalliferous muds. The hot solutions were emanating from an active subseafloor rift. The highly saline character of the waters was not hospitable to living organisms.[20] The brines and associated muds are currently under investigation as a source of mineable precious and base metals.

The chemosynthetic ecosystem surrounding submarine hydrothermal vents were discovered along the Galapagos Rift, a spur of the East Pacific Rise, in 1977 by a group of marine geologists led by Jack Corliss of Oregon State University. In 1979, biologists returned to the rift and used DSV Alvin, an ONR research submersible from Woods Hole Oceanographic Institute, to see the hydrothermal vent communities with their own eyes. In that same year, Peter Lonsdale published the first scientific paper on hydrothermal vent life.[21]

In 2005, Neptune Resources NL, a mineral exploration company, applied for and was granted 35,000 km² of exploration rights over the Kermadec Arc in New Zealand's Exclusive Economic Zone to explore for seafloor massive sulfide deposits, a potential new source of lead-zinc-copper sulfides formed from modern hydrothermal vent fields. The discovery of a vent in the Pacific Ocean offshore of Costa Rica, named the Medusa hydrothermal vent field (after the serpent-haired Medusa of Greek mythology), was announced in April 2007.[22] The Ashadze hydrothermal field (13°N on the Mid-Atlantic Ridge, elevation -4200 m) was the deepest known high-temperature hydrothermal field until 2010, when the Piccard site (18°33′N 81°43′W, elevation -5000 m) was discovered by a group of scientists from NASA Jet Propulsion Laboratory and Woods Hole Oceanographic Institute. This site is located on the 110 km long, ultraslow spreading Mid-Cayman Rise within the Cayman Trough.[23] On February 21st the deepest known hydrothermal vents were discovered in the Caribbean at a depth of almost 5,000 metres (16,000 ft)


Hydrothermal vents, in some instances, have led to the formation of exploitable mineral resources via deposition of seafloor massive sulfide deposits. The Mount Isa orebody located in Queensland, Australia, is an excellent example.

Recently, mineral exploration companies, driven by the elevated price activity in the base metals sector during the mid-2000s, have turned their attention to extraction of mineral resources from hydrothermal fields on the seafloor. Significant cost reductions are, in theory, possible.

Two companies are currently engaged in the late stages of commencing to mine seafloor massive sulfides. Nautilus Minerals is in the advanced stages of commencing extraction from its Solwarra deposit, in the Bismarck Archipelago, and Neptune Minerals is at an earlier stage with its Rumble II West deposit, located on the Kermadec Arc, near the Kermadec Islands. Both companies are proposing using modified existing technology. Nautilus Minerals, in partnership with Placer Dome (now part of Barrick Gold), succeeded in 2006 in returning over 10 metric tons of mined SMS to the surface using modified drum cutters mounted on an ROV, a world first. Neptune Minerals in 2007 succeeded in recovering SMS sediment samples using a modified oil industry suction pump mounted on an ROV, also a world first.

Potential seafloor mining has environmental impacts including dust plumes from mining machinery affecting filter feeding organisms, collapsing or reopening vents, methane clathrate release, or even sub-oceanic land slides. A large amount of work is currently being engaged in by both the above mentioned companies to ensure that potential environmental impacts of seafloor mining are well understood and control measures are implemented, before exploitation commences.

Attempts have been made in the past to exploit minerals from the seafloor. The 1960s and 70s saw a great deal of activity (and expenditure) in the recovery of manganese nodules from the abyssal plains, with varying degrees of success. This does demonstrate however that recovery of minerals from the seafloor is possible, and has been possible for some time. Interestingly, mining of manganese nodules served as a cover story for the elaborate attempt by the CIA to raise the sunken Soviet submarine K-129, using the Glomar Explorer, a ship purpose built for the task by Howard Hughes. The operation was known as Project Azorian, and the cover story of seafloor mining of manganese nodules may have served as the impetus to propel other companies to make the attempt.


The conservation of hydrothermal vents has been the subject of sometimes heated discussion in the Oceanographic Community for the last 20 years. It has been pointed out that it may be that those causing the most damage to these fairly rare habitats are scientists. There have been attempts to forge agreements over the behavior of scientists investigating vent sites but although there is an agreed code of practice there is as yet no formal international and legally binding agreement.


The next graphic below shows a couple of examples of a hydro thermal vent in the bottom of the ocean, known as white smokers and black smokers.

Sooooooo, could these be the fountains of the deep as referenced in the Biblical account of the Genesis flood? 

Well . . . admittedly, these do look almost like underwater fountains of a sort. But, all of these hydro thermal vents have been spewing forth their super-heated water and mineral contents for many eons, and yet . . . these hydro-thermal vents have not added any extra water to our oceans to cause sea levels to rise. No, these white and black smokers simply circulate the same water over and over again, never adding more water to the oceans. It's sort of like the same principle as to how your kitchen coffee percolator works, just cycling the same water over and over again and again, as they have been doing for many eons. Instead of being the fountains of the deep, they're more like . . . the percolators of the deep.

So, we have deep sea geysers, called white smokers and black smokers. 

Me . . . I'm a fat smoker! I like to smoke a pipe and cigars, and have been doing so since I was only 19 years old, and as of this publication, I'm now 62 years old. Yeah! I'm a white fat smoker!

Ah! But I digress . . . so, let's get back on topic again.

Anyway  . . . . . . .

The next graphic below shows how the same water is cycled over and over and over again and again.

The colder water at the bottom of the sea simply seeps down into the porous rock and soil, down into the lower levels where temperatures rise when it comes into contact with the hot volcanic magma below. The water is then super-heated to extreme high temperatures. The steam them rises up, carrying minerals upward which accumulates on the surface of the sea bottom gradually building up chimney-like structures. 

The super-heated steam rises up into the colder surrounding waters. As the steam rises, the colder waters seep back down into the porous soil, and back down to be reheated again. This is a continuous cycle that has been going on for many many many eons of time due to volcanic activity.  

Again . . . It sort of works on the same basic  principle as your kitchen coffee percolator.

So, these hydro-thermal vents are NOT the fountains of the deep, but rather, they are the percolators of the deep. Of course, you would not want to drink this really toxic brew! YYYEEEEEEEUUUUUKKKKK!!!

The next graphic below is a diagram of  the interior your own kitchen coffee percolator.

Your coffee percolator just cycles the same water over and over again. It bloops up, then seeps down through the coffee grounds and back down into the water below, and is heated again and bloops up again, over and over again and again. It's almost like having a table-top model of a typical deep sea hydro-thermal vent.

So . . . once again . . . there are no fountains of the deep, but only percolators of the deep! 

And now, speaking of percolators . . . and coffee  . . . . . time for a commercial message. And coffee is served in the diner coach, along with the bitch-asses of Christard Fundies on a silver platter.

Now, on to our commercial . . . . .

Anytime, is a good time to kick back and enjoy a STARBUCKS dark roast coffee 

Also, have a nice cool Frappuccino.

I always like to go to STARBUCKS  every chance I get, because I like the atmosphere there, and I enjoy having conversations with students who hang out at STARBUCKS. I almost never see any religious retards hanging out at a STARBUCKS.

Also, STARBUCKS supports and endorses marriage equality and many progressive causes.

Now back to our programming, still in progress . . . . . . .

So, anyway . . . . .

We now know . . . . . that these hydro-thermal vents (the white smokers and the black smokers) are NOT the so-called fountains of the deep as in the Genesis account of the flood, but only the percolators of the deep!

OK . . . . . . . once again . . . . .  concerning my favorite hangout at STARBUCKS . . .

It has recently come under attack again from right-wing Christard Funny-mentalist nincompoops! 


Here is an article from the retarded right-wing website


Yeah! Check out this fucking retarded shit!

Starbucks shows its hatred of God 
Posted by Paul Shannon  / December 1, 2013   

Starbucks doesn’t mind using millions of tax dollars to help out its international interests. They also don’t mind despising the second amendment. They have a philanthropic that recently appeared on the singing competition show “The Voice”. They decided, among all the songs they could choose from, to choose Will The Circle Be Unbroken to sing with the contestants. This gospel song is one that many grew up with and has even helped calm people at their worst. Instead of honoring the song, they took out all references to God, much to the surprise of the show’s producer Mark Burnett and show judge and country star Blake Shelton.

Blake Shelton response to the Starbucks move

Here is a statement by Blake Shelton.

“I’ve heard — you know, in the twenty minutes I’ve had since the show ended to come in here — a lot of different reasons why it was that way,” the country star explains. “I know it was performed — and it’s meant for a good cause, and they’re trying to raise some money. And that’s a good thing. But I will say, that’s not the version I grew up on. And that’s not the version I was singing sitting in my chair, if that clears up anything [about] where I stand on this thing.”

Mark Burnett response on Starbucks move

Here is the statement by Mark Burnett.

“Especially for those of us who know this song from church so well . . . I realized immediately what had happened,” Burnett told Zap2it. “I thought I’d misheard on the sound. Then came the next chorus, and I’m like, ‘OK, it’s live TV, so I’ve got to wait until the next commercial break. I’m running over there and asking the question.”

So, all the Christard Fundies have their collective panties in a bunch, because, at some singing contest sponsored by Starbucks, someone took the melody from a Gospel song, Will The Circle Be Unbroken, and changed the words, leaving out any reference to God. Well . . . . . boo hoo! Big fucking deal!

OK, nobody at Starbucks wrote the changed lyrics to the song. Starbucks wasn't responsible for that. 

Anyway . . . . . many popular songs have been used in commercials where the lyrics have been changed, for example: in a Coca Cola commercial  back in the late 1970s and early 1980s there was a song, like, I Want to Buy The World a Coke, that I had seen so many times on TV.

Some of the original lyrics to the song went like this . . .

I want to buy the world a home
and furnish it with love
Grow apple tress and honey bees
and snow white turtle doves

Well, I don't know all the lyrics. But you can get the picture. It's not uncommon for popular songs to be used in commercials and have the lyrics changed to advertise their products.

So, why do some Christian Fundies have to get their undies in a bunch over some lyrics being changed in one of  the religious melodies in one of their favorite hymns? 

Well . . . you Christians Fundies don't have to come to Starbucks if you don't like it. OK? 

I wouldn't want any of you fucking retards coming into my favorite Starbucks in your shitty diapers, anyway! Got that? Ya fucking retards!!!

You Christian retards can always hang out at Chick-fil-A where all the CONservative Republicans and homophobic Christian retards hang out! OK?  

Chick-fil-A is where all the Christian retards hang out!!!

OK! OK! OK! We've been getting way way way off topic here! 

So . . . let us get back on topic again.

Now . . . what were we talking about?

Oh yeah! Now I remember . . . . .

We were talking about Walt Brown's favorite hydro-plate hypotheses. Yeah! That's it!

OK, Quack Doctor Walt Brown! You have just got your bitch-ass served up to you on a nice shinny silver platter! Yeah! So much for Wally Brown-nose and his stupid, idiotic, moronic, imbecilic, and FUCKING RETARDED hydro-plate hypothesis. Eh?

Anyway . . . . .  we are now finished with the hydro-plate part of this whole stupid fiasco!

Now then . . . . . let us get back again to the equally retarded vapor canopy, or water canopy, or ice canopy, or (whatever the fuck it is) stupid hypothesis!

OK, in all fairness . . . Walt Brown is actually . . . somewhat skeptical of the water or ice canopy idea.

But . . . it is Kent Hovind, and Eric Hovind (Son of Jailbird, Kent Hovind) who are the really big advocates of the water or ice canopy hypothesis. So . . . as for the canopy hypothesis, well . . . it's their baby! 

Of course, just like Walt Brown, both Kent Hovind and Eric Hovind are also advocates of the retarded hydro-plate "theory" as well. But, the canopy "theory" that's their baby!!!

Yeah! I really think that it is now high time that we finally got around to serving both Kent and Eric Hovind's bitch-asses up on a silver platter!

OK, as I had mentioned much earlier, there is simply not enough water to flood the entire earth up to the highest mountains. The estimated volume of water in the atmosphere at any one time is about 3,100 cubic miles or 12,900 cubic kilometers. Now, you might think that it sound like a lot, but it is only about 0.001 percent of the total Earth's water volume. If all of the water in the atmosphere rained down at once, it would only cover the ground to a depth of 2.5 centimeters, about 1 inch.

Anyway . . . getting back to Kent and Eric Hovind, and their stupid canopy hypothesis again . . . 

There are three different idiotic and moronic versions of the so-called canopy hypothesis that I know of as depicted in the next graphic below. 

OK, as I had mentioned earlier, if all the water in the earth's atmosphere were to condense and fall as rain until there was not a single cloud left anywhere on the globe, and the humidity was down to ZERO percent, then the ocean levels would only rise about 2.5 centimeters, that is about 1 inch. Some land areas might get many inches of rainfall, but the run-off would still only raise sea levels about an inch.

And . . . . . if all the ice covering Antarctica, Greenland, and in mountain glaciers around the world were to melt, and including, every God damn ice cube in all the refrigerators around the world, again, sea level would only rise about 70 meters or about 230 feet, which is certainly NOT enough to flood the entire earth.

But, as in fucking retarded scenario #1, according to Creationist retards, there was supposedly a water canopy or vapor canopy in the upper regions of the earth's atmosphere. OK, if there had been enough water vapor in said canopy to flood the earth up to the highest mountain tops in just 40 days, and if Mount Everest is 29,000 feet, that would be 348,000 inches, and that would amount to about 8,700 inches of rain per day! 

So far, the highest rain fall on record for a 24 hour period was about 182.5 centimeters or 71.8 inches which had occurred at Foc-Foc, La Reunion [21°14'S by 55°41'E, elevation: 2,990 meters or 9,810 feet] sometime back in 1966. For there to be enough water to flood the entire glob, there would have to be about 348,000 times as much water vapor in the earth's atmosphere as there is now. 

OK, as of now . . . in reality . . . the atmospheric pressure at sea level is about 15 pounds per square inch. But if this vapor canopy had existed before the Genesis flood, then the atmospheric pressure at sea level would have been about 13,500 pounds per square inch, or 900 times our present atmospheric pressure at sea level. this would be about 10 times the atmospheric pressure as on the surface of Venus, only instead of water, on Venus, it's CO2. At 900 atmospheres of pressure, this would also be equivalent to the pressure at  9,000 meters or about  29,527.56 feet deep in the ocean.  

And, what do you suppose would have happened to . . . Noah and his family . . . after all the water in the vapor canopy had fallen to the earth, and the atmospheric pressure had dropped from 13,500 pounds per square inch down to about 15 pounds per square inch in just 40 days??? Eh?

Well . . . . . something, like . . . . . THIS . . . . . would have happened to Noah, all his family members, and all the animals on his stupid ark!

Yeah! Not a pretty sight! Eh? No! Not a pretty sight!

Also, if the earth had that much water vapor in it's atmosphere, then, the cloud deck would have extended many thousands of miles above the earth's surface. The earth would have been more like a Jovian-type of gas giant planet, about the size of Uranus or Neptune with the earth being it's solid core.

OK, now . . . on to fucking retarded scenario #2, where the vapor canopy was supposedly to have existed high above the earth's surface with all the water molecules in orbit around the earth! Oh! Really??? At a hundred miles above the earth,  the orbital velocity is about 17,000 miles per hour.  Over the years we have placed many satellites in various kinds of orbits above the earth. Some satellites revolve around the earth in circular orbits, some in elliptical orbits, some in an equatorial orbit, some in polar orbits, and at just about every angle in between.

The next graphic below shows the many different kinds of satellite orbits around the earth.

Now . . . imagine water droplets, each pursuing it's own unique orbit around the earth, each one orbiting at various angles. Now, imagine a drop of water orbiting in an equatorial orbit colliding with another drop of water in a polar orbit. We would have all these trillions and quadrillions and quintillions of water droplets colliding into each other at various angles and at very high speed of at least 17,000 miles per hour. The water would get super-heated to about 2,000 to 3,000 degrees Fahrenheit. It would no longer be a cool vapor canopy, but a hot glowing canopy of death! The sky above would be glowing a bright fiery yellowish orange! All life down on the earth's surface would get fried!

Oh! And by the way . . . a water canopy can't exist in the vacuum of space, because out in space water boils at much lower temperatures, like, room tempera. Also, the super-heated water molecules would move at escape velocity, and the water canopy would have evaporated off into space.

Anyway . . . . . . . 

The only reason why we can have so many satellites in orbit around the earth at so many different angles is because they are also orbiting at different altitudes above the earth, thus reducing the risk of a collision between one satellite and another. When we put satellites in orbit, each orbit is planned and calculated.

So, a vapor or water canopy is simply not gravitationally viable, therefore it is a physical impossibility.  

Oh! But you're probably thinking . . . . . along with water droplets in orbit above the equator, couldn't there also be droplets of water in parallel orbits, north and south of their equatorial orbits???

Yeah, sort of like the next graphic below . . . . .

So . . . once again . . . the question is . . . . . along with water droplets in orbit above the equator, couldn't there also be droplets of water in parallel orbits, north and south of the equatorial orbit???

The answer . . . to the above question . . . is . . . a  . . . great . . . big . . .  fat . . . NO!!!

Which now lead us to . . .  fucking retarded scenario #3, the solid ice canopy high above the earth's surface. OK . . .  let us assume that we have this spherical shell of ice about a hundred miles above the earth. At 100 miles, the orbital velocity would be about 17,000 miles per hour. The equatorial part of the shell would be rotating at that speed. But, all the parallel zones north and south of the equatorial zones would be revolving at slower and slower speeds until you get to the polar regions, where the rotational speed of the spherical shell would be ZERO!!!

So, because the zones north and south of the equatorial zone would be revolving slower, it would be less than the minimum velocity to maintain an orbit above the earth. As a result, all of these northern and southern zones, and the polar regions, would not be able to stay up there, thus, causing the spherical ice canopy to break up and collapse, and great big sheets of ice would come crashing down, heating up as they enter the earth's atmosphere to about a couple thousand degrees Fahrenheit, and the hot vapor would raise the temperature of the earth's atmosphere, and again, in this sorry scenario, all life on the earth would get fried alive! And those sheets of ice large enough to not get completely vaporized, some of those would last long enough to impact the ground, thus vaporizing instantly. So, many of us would get crushed and fried! 

Not a pretty sight!

OK, what if the ice canopy were located much higher? At 100 miles above the earth, orbital velocities are about 17,000 miles per hour. But at a much higher elevation, orbital velocities are slower. But even still, a spherical shell of ice would break up, and the huge sheets of ice would have more distance to fall and an even higher impact velocity. So, it would be an even worse case scenario.  

Anyway . . . . . as I had mentioned much earlier, this whole stupid vapor, or water, or ice canopy idea, that's Kent Hovind's baby! Walt Brown may be fucking stupid, but he's not nearly as fucking stupid and fucking retarded as Kent Hovind, and his moronic son, Eric Hovind.

Of course, Kent Hovind is currently serving a 10 year sentence in the federal penitentiary for fraud and tax evasion, and he should be out sometime in 2016. So, he's pretty fucking stupid! And no, he is NOT being persecuted by the Federal Government because of his Christian Fundamentalist beliefs. He's doing time in the slammer because he's a lying sack of shit, and a scumbag tax evading thief. Maybe his son is a little bit smarter, I really don't know about that, because so far, he's managed to stay out of the pokey. But, who knows? One of these days he just might join his ol' man behind bars.

OK, my dear passengers, if you'll all look out to the right, remember . . . everything in the Land of the Tards is off to the far right . . . you'll see the prison where that fucking retard, Kent Hovind, is doing his time.

Kent Hovind should remember, that if he drops the 
soap in the showers, not to bend over to pick it up!
Well . . . . . my advice to them would be . . . if you're in the shower, and you happen to drop the soap, don't bend over to pick it up! Also, before Eric Hovind joins his papa in the clink, he should be practicing his deep-knee squats to pick up the soap in his shower at home!

Don't do the crime 
if you can't do the time!
Don't talk the talk
if you can't walk the walk!
Stay out if the kitchen
if you can't stand the heat!
And don't listen to no Rock n Roll
if you don't dig the beat!

OK, getting back on topic again . . . . . .

And now . . . my dear passengers, if you will look out toward the right (everything in the Land of the Tards is off to the right) you will see the Patriot Bible University where Kent Hovind got his PhD in Post-hole digging!

Yeah, this looks like one of those double-wide manufactured homes where you buy mobile homes. Only you take the wheels off, and put to two halves together, and set it up on a permanent concrete foundation. This so-called "University" is just another one of those diploma mills. It is NOT an accredited school. It should be called TTU for Trailer Trash University!

Yeah! I guess . . . that the Federal Prison Camp near Montgomery, Alabama, where Kent Hovind is presently residing, that must be his finishing school. Eh?

Anyway . . . getting back to BOTH the hydro-plate hypothesis AND the canopy hypothesis.

While both Kent Hovind and Eric Hovind both believe, that before the Genesis flood, there was either a vapor canopy, or a water canopy, or an ice canopy forming a shell high above the earth . . . there are some Christian Fundamentalists that even believe that the layer of ice above the earth sat on top of the earth's atmosphere! Yeah! We're supposed to believe that ice can just float in the air! Really??? Really??? Really???

But, that would be an even worse case scenario, because the weight of the ice on top of the air, would compress the earth's atmosphere to extreme high pressures at ground level.

Sooooooo . . . are we actually suppose to believe that rock can float on top of water, and ice can float on top of the air??? Are we really suppose to believe this fucking retarded bullshit??? Eh?

Well . . . . . . . I guess so!!!

Anyway . . . . .

I would suggest that all Christian Fundamentalist retards would simply try this little experiment to test the validity of both, their hydro-plate and the ice canopy hypothesis, as shown in the next graphic below . . . . .

OK, you Christian Fundamentalist Creationist RETARDS!!!

Here is a little "scientific" experiment that you can do at home.

You will need the following items:

1.) A bucket filled with water.
2.) A length of rope.
3.) A rock, preferable a flat rock, but it really doesn't matter.
4.) A block of ice. Keep it in the freezer until you are ready to set up your experiment.
5.) A pair of scissors. 

First . . . fill the bucket with water and place the bucket on the ground in your yard next to a tree. 

Second . . . tie one end of the rope around the rock, and a couple of feet further from the end, make a loop in the rope to hold the block of ice.  If you're too fucking retarded to tie knots, then, get some boy scout to help you with your little project.

Third . . . get the block of ice from your freezer, and loop the rope around it. OK, before you try to do this experiment, wait until a cold winter day. Because, if you try to do this experiment on a hot summer day, the ice block will start melting and it might slip out of the loop in the rope. So, wait until winter to do this experiment. OK?

Fourth . . . throw the other end of the rope over a tree limb, and pull on the end of the rope, raising the rock and ice block up, until the rock is at the same height as the water level in the bucket, and have the rock suspended just above the water in the bucket.

Fifth and final . . . you are now ready to perform your little experiment. Get your scissors and prepare to cut the rope above the ice block. 

Oh! And another word of advice . . . don't do this experiment in your front yard where all your neighbors can see you, and wonder what the fucking Hell you're up to! No, instead, set this experiment up in your back yard, because, you're going to look really stupid hanging a block of ice and a rock above a bucket of water! Yeah! It just looks kind of dumb! OK?

 Anyway . . . . .

You are now ready to cut the rope above the ice  block with your scissors.

But, before you do . . . . . ask yourself this question . . . 

"What will happen if I cut the rope with the scissors?"

Now THINK before you answer! OK?  

Now, I say . . . . . when you cut the rope with the scissors, the rock will sink to the bottom of the bucket, and the ice block will fall into the bucket and float on top of the water.

Of course, if you are one of those right-wing Christian Fundamentalist creationist fucking RETARDS, then, you will probably say something like  . . . . . . .

"DUH! I believe that the rock will float on top of the water because Walt Brown, in his hydro-plate theory says the earth's crust was on top of a layer of water before the Genesis flood. DUH! HUH! HUH! And I also believe that the ice block will stay up in the air because Kent Hovind, in his ice canopy theory says that before the genesis flood, there was a shell of ice high above the earth. DUH! HUH! HUH! Therefore, the rock will float on top of the water, because Walt Brown says so! DUH! And the ice block will float in the air because Kent Hovind says so! DUH! Yeah! So there!!! DUH! HUH! HUH! HUH! Yeah! Those two guys is real smart!" 

OK, now that you have thought this through, go ahead, and proceed to cut the rope just above the ice block with your scissors, and watch what happens!

Well . . . what happened?

I'll tell you what happened!

When you cut the rope, both the ice block and the rock fell. The rock sank to the bottom of the bucket, and the block of ice fell into the bucket with a splash! The ice is now floating on top of the water, and the rock is now sitting down in the bottom of the water in said bucket. And you're now standing there, looking like a dumb-ass! Yeah! That's what happened!  

OK, let me guess . . . If you're a Christian RETARD, then, you probably thought that the rock would be floating on top of the water in the bucket, and the block of ice would just be floating in the air above the bucket. But no! That's not what happened! Isn't it!

Oh gee! Are you disappointed? Aw! You mad???

Well, now that you have completed your experiment, here's the next thing you should do . . .

First, remove the ice and the rock from the bucket. Don't dump out the water yet . . . because there is one more thing you need to do.

Now that you have removed the ice block and the rock from the bucket, here's what you need to do next. OK?

Dunk your head into the bucket of cold water three times and only take your head out twice!

OK, I'm being cynical here. OK? 

No, I don't really seriously believe that Walt Brown, or Kent Hovind, or his son, Eric Hovind, or that  even most Christian Fundamentalists are actually stupid enough to believe that if the rope is cut above the ice block, the the ice block will just stay floating in the air, and the rock will float on top of the water in the bucket! Nah! Not even Christian Fundamentalist could be that fucking retarded! Or could they?

But, even so . . . to believe in the ice or vapor or water canopy hypothesis, and the hydro-plate hypothesis, is just as equally stupid and fucking RETARDED! Because, if you believe that, then, you may as well believe that a rock can float on top of water and a block of ice can float in the air.

Oh! But wait! I keep forgetting! When God created the earth, he could make the rocky crust float on top of the waters below between the crust and the mantle, and he could make a spherical shell of water or ice high above the earth! Right? I mean, like, seriously! God can do anything! Right?

Yeah! I keep forgetting that! Duh! Stupid me!


Well . . . . . I think we're done debunking the hydro-plate hypothesis and the water or ice canopy hypothesis for now. So, we shall go on to some other Creationist stupidity.

Yeah! Here is some more Christian stupidity! You all are gonna love this!

This next little gem is related to the hydro-plate concept. During the Genesis flood, when the fountains of the deep were broken up, the earth's crust was supposed to have collapse, causing the deep waters to gush upward from fractures in the earth's crust.

Oh! But wait! It gets even better!

All this water from the fountains of the deep gushed upward at escape velocity (about 7 miles per second) and as the water gushed out into space, the waters froze into various sized chunks of ice ranging from the size of snow flakes to the size of football fields! And get this! Many of these great big chunks of ice impacted on the moon, which is why the moon now has craters.  But, this does not account for why the moon has fewer craters the near side facing the earth, and many more craters on the far side turned away from the earth. Oh! and by the way, there might even be some dead whales laying about on the moon's surface! That's because many sea creatures might have been caught up by the waters spewing out into space! Yeah! Really! I'm not kidding! Some Christian Fundamentalists actually believe this scenario!

Also . . . some of this ice was supposed to have impacted on the moons of Jupiter and Saturn, which is why they're covered with ice. And finally . . .some of this ice even formed the rings around Saturn!

Yeah! Really! Like . . . . . we are suppose to believe this BULLSHIT!!!

Oh! And there's more. This is the reason why we now have comets! Really!

YES! YES! YES! We are actually suppose to believe this crap! Because, if we don't . . . we will all go to Hell after we die!


Gee! All this Biblical mythology sounds almost like the old lumber-jack stories told up in the north woods of Minnesota, stories of Paul Bunion and Babe The Blue Ox! Doesn't it?

OK . . . as we all should know by now, the average density of the earths crust is almost 3 grams per cubic centimeter, and the density of water is 1 gram per cubic centimeter, about 1/3 the density of the earth's crust.

Now . . . suppose you have a see-saw, or teeter totter like you see in a kid's playground. OK, place a three pound rock on one end of the see-saw. Hold another three pound rock 10 feet above the other end of the sea-saw, and drop it. As the three pound rock lands on that end of the see-saw, it causes that end to go down, and the other end to flip up, sending the other three pound rock about 10 feet up into the air before it falls back down again.

Now . . . do this again, but this time, take a plastic bag the same size and volume as the three pound rock. But, the plastic bag will only hold one pound of water. So, the water is 1/3 the weight of the rock. Place the one pound bag of water on one end of the see-saw. Again, hold the three-pound rock 10 feet above the other end of the see-saw, and let it drop. The end of the see-saw with the bag of water on it will flip up, causing the one pound bag of water to rise, this time, 30 feet into the air before falling back down again. That's because the water weighs 1/3 as much as the rock that was dropped 10 feet.

OK . . . the same principle would apply to what would  have happened during the collapse of the earth's crust. If a section of the earth's crust had dropped one mile downward, the water gushing up from the fractures in the earth's crust would have gushed up only about three miles. It would NOT have reach escape velocity to be spewed out into space.

Thus, we have debunked another Creationist myth!

Oh! But we're not done yet!

This one is the best one yet! You're gonna love this one! It's almost cute!

Yeah! This is my most favorite part!

In the Genesis account, after Noah's Ark had landed on top of Mount Ararat, the flood waters eventually subsided from all the earth. Now, all those animals that were on the ark had to find their ways back home to their original native lands from which they were gathered.

OK, how did all those polar bears get back to the Arctic? How did those cute little penguins waddle their way back to Antarctica? How did those hopping kangaroos and those cute furry little koala bears find their way back to Australia? Eh?

Well . . . the answer is actually quite simple, really.

Sometime after the ark landed on Mount Ararat, there was a great volcanic eruption, a really huge explosion that launched all of these animals high up into the air, sending them all flying on ballistic trajectories back to their native lands! Yeah! That's the ticket!

So, if you were a polar bear, the great volcanic explosion blew you sky high, and sent you high above the earth flying on a ballistic trajectory where you eventually came down thousands of miles away, landing in the Arctic, tumbling and rolling as you plopped down into the snow! It's the same if you were a penguin, only you were sent on a ballistic trajectory thousands of miles away to Antarctica where you tumbled and rolled as you plopped down in the snow, or perhaps you splashed down in the sea. And if you were a kangaroo or a cute furry little koala bear, you were sent on a ballistic trajectory thousands of miles away to Australia where you tumbled and rolled as you plopped down in a grassy field somewhere.

So, God had it all figured out! God can do anything! Right?

Oh really??? We're actually expected to believe this carp?

OK, first of all . . . if you were thrown on a ballistic trajectory to somewhere many thousands of miles away, you would be blown out of the earth's atmosphere where you would die from a lack of oxygen and air to breath, and sent flying on a parabolic path through the vacuum of space above the atmosphere, and then as you came back down, your body would burn up as you re-entered the earth's atmosphere, and you would be nothing but ashes. You will not tumble and roll as you hit the ground. There would be nothing left of you to tumble and roll on the ground.

And, second of all . .  a really tremendous volcanic explosion may send rocks and boulders off on ballistic trajectories, but . . . . . if you were standing on the summit of the mountain when the volcano blew it's top, you would not be merely tossed up into the air by the explosion. NO! You would be vaporized by the intense heat, and only your ashes would be carried upward with the smoke and volcanic ash. And you will only come down as ashes. Wow! Talk about Bake And Shake!

OK! I think I've had quite enough of all of this moronic idiocy and fucking retardery!

Yeah! Maybe I'll take my shirt off and flog myself with the extension cord!

Nah! I think that instead, I'll just kick back and relax with a Dark Roast coffee and smoke a nice big fat cigar. I need to do some adult stuff now, especially after having to deal with all these fucking retarded Christian Fundamentalist Kindergartners!  

And so, my dear passengers, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, this is the bottom line. This is what we are expected to believe if we don't want to go to Hell after we die!

We are actually expected to believe the following . . .

1.) A layer of water, or a shell of ice surrounded the earth before the Genesis flood.
2.) Before the Genesis flood, the earth's crust floated on a deep layer of water above the hot mantle.
3.) Noah had dinosaurs on board is ark.
4.) When the fountains of the deep broke up water gushed upward at escape velocity.
5.) There might be dead whales laying about on the surface of the moon.
6.) Unicorns existed, because the Bible does mention them. (see Job 39:9-12)
7.) A volcanic eruption send animals on a ballistic trajectory back to their native lands.

I could probably think of some more stupid shit that we are expected to believe in. But, I have had quite enough already! I don't have a strong stomach for any more stupidity. Well . . . I do have a big stomach, but not a strong stomach. 

I'm allergic to BULLSHIT!!! The gag factor is way too much for me!

Anyway . . . . . there is absolutely no scientific geological evidence 
that a global flood has ever occurred.

OK, before we continue, my dear passengers, if you will all please join me again in the entertainment coach for another music break.

The train conductor will lead us as we all sing along to the following lyrics.

The Unicorn
by The Irish Rovers

A long time ago, when the earth was still green,
There were more kinds of animals than you've ever seen;
They'd run around free while the earth was being born,
The loveliest of all was the Unicorn.

There was green alligators and long-necked geese,
Some humpty-backed camels and some chimpanzees,
Some cats and rats and elephants, but sure as you're born,
The loveliest of all was the Unicorn.

Now God seen some sinnin' and it gave Him pain.
And He said, "Stand back, I'm going to make it rain!"
He said, "Hey, brother Noah, I'll tell you what to do.
Build me a floating zoo."

And take some of them green alligators and long-necked geese,
Some humpty-backed camels and some chimpanzees,
Some cats and rats and elephants, but sure as you're born,
Don't you forget my Unicorn!"

Old Noah was there to answer the call,
He finished up making the Ark just as the rain started fallin',
He marched in the animals two by two
And he called out as they went through,
"Hey, Lord! I've got yer . . .

Green alligators and long-necked geese,
Some humpty-backed camels and some chimpanzees,
Some cats and rats and elephants, but Lord, I'm so forlorn,
I just can't see no Unicorn."

Old Noah looked out into the driving rain,
Them Unicorns was hiding, playing silly games,
Kicking and splashing while the rain was pouring,
Oh, them silly Unicorns!

There was green alligators and long-necked geese,
Some humpty-backed camels and some chimpanzees,
Noah cried, "Close the doors 'cause the rain is pourin',
And we just can't wait for no Unicorns!"

The Ark started movin', it drifted with the tide,
Them Unicorns looked up from the rock and they cried,
And the waters came down and sorta floated them away,
That's why  . . .  you'll never see a Unicorn . . . to this very day.

You'll see green alligators and long-necked geese,
Some humpty-backed camels and some chimpanzees,
Some cats and rats and elephants, but sure as you're born,
You're never gonna see no Unicorn.

OK, that was a cute little song. Even though I don't believe in the Bible fairy tale about Noah's Ark, and I don't believe that unicorns ever actually existed, it's still a cute song, and I do like it. A dumb song, yes! But, still a cute song with a nice sweet Irish melody. Who can not like it? 

Also, I will never believe that unicorns ever existed. Not until . . . paleontologists ever discover the fossil remains of a unicorn, then, and only then, will I accept that had unicorns existed.

But so far, no fossil evidence of unicorn have been found, and probably never will.

Anyway . . . . .

Now that we are quite finished with our debunkary (is that an actual word?) or, our debunktation (that's not an actual word either!) or, rather, our debunking both the hydro-plate hypothesis and the canopy hypotheses, we will now go on to debunking the so-called polystrate fossils.

In actuality, there really is no such thing as a polystrate fossil. Polystrate is just a word made up by Christian Fundamentalist Creationist retards to describe fossilize tree trunks which supposedly are thrusting up through many layers of rock strata.

No! These are NOT layers of rock strata, but rather, nothing more then just layers of sedimentary deposits, which occurs in low lying flood planes, like swamps, or what was once low lying flood planes. These are usually associated with areas where coal deposits are found.

Sedimentary deposits are also associated with sediments of volcanic ash from erupting volcanoes. But these are not layers of metamorphic or igneous rock layers. Naturally of course, there can be metamorphic or igneous rock layers above or below some sedimentary layers.   

Igneous and metamorphic rock layers are laid down over many millions and billions of years, while sedimentary layers of sand or mud or volcanic ash are laid down rather rapidly by comparison. But again, there is no evidence that there was ever a global flood as in the biblical Genesis account of Noah's Ark. Because, if there was, then, there would be mostly sedimentary deposits all over the globe, which there is NOT! There are only small localized regions were sedimentary deposits exist.  

The following Wikipedia article explains this in more detail.


Polystrate fossil
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

A polystrate fossil is a fossil of a single organism (such as a tree trunk) that extends through more than one geological stratum. This term is typically applied to "fossil forests" of upright fossil tree trunks and stumps that have been found worldwide, i.e. in the Eastern United States, Eastern Canada, England, France, Germany, and Australia, typically associated with coal-bearing strata. Within Carboniferous coal-bearing strata, it is also very common to find what are called Stigmaria (root stocks) within the same stratum. Stigmaria are completely absent in post-Carboniferous strata, which contain either coal, polystrate trees, or both. The word polystrate is not a standard geological term. This term is typically found in creationist publications.

 Geological explanation

In geology such fossils are referred to as upright fossils, 

trunks, or trees. Brief periods of rapid sedimentation favor their formation. Upright fossils are typically found in layers associated with an actively subsiding coastal plain or rift basin, or with the accumulation of volcanic material around a periodically erupting stratovolcano. Typically, this period of rapid sedimentation was followed by a period of time, decades to thousands of years long, characterized by very slow or no accumulation of sediments. In river deltas and other coastal plain settings, rapid sedimentation is often the end result of a brief period of accelerated subsidence of an area of coastal plain relative to sea level caused by salt tectonics, global sea level rise, growth faulting, continental margin collapse, or some combination of these factors. For example, geologists such as John W. F. Waldron and Michael C. Rygel have argued that the rapid burial and preservation of polystrate fossil trees found at Joggins, Nova Scotia was the direct result of rapid subsidence, caused by salt tectonics within an already subsiding pull apart basin, and resulting rapid accumulation of sediments. The specific layers containing polystrate fossils occupy only a very limited fraction of the total area of any of these basins.


The upright fossil trees of the Gallatin Petrified Forest in the Gallatin Range and the Yellowstone Petrified Forest at Amethyst Mountain and Specimen Ridge in Yellowstone National Park, occur buried within the lahars and other volcanic deposits comprising the Eocene Lamar River Formation as the result of periods of rapid sedimentation associated with explosive volcanism. This type of volcanism generates and deposits large quantities of loose volcanic material as a blanket over the slope of a volcano as happened during the 1991 eruption of Mount Pinatubo. Both during and for years after a period of volcanism occurs, lahars and normal stream activity wash this loose volcanic material downslope. These processes result in the rapid burial of large areas of the surrounding countryside beneath several meters of sediment as directly observed during the 1991 eruption of Mount Pinatubo. As is the case of modern lahar deposits, the sedimentary layers containing upright trees of the Yellowstone petrified forest are discontinuous and very limited in areal extent. Individual layers containing upright trees and individual buried forests occupy only a very small fraction of the total area of Yellowstone National Park.

Fossil soils

Geologists have recognized innumerable fossil soils (paleosols) throughout the 

strata containing upright fossils at Joggins, Nova Scotia, Yellowstone petrified forests, coal mines of the Black Warrior Basin of Alabama, and many other locations. The layer immediately underlying coal seams, often called either "seatearth or underclay", typically either consists of or contains a paleosol. Paleosols are soils which were formed by subaerial weathering during periods of very slow or no accumulation of sediments. Later, renewed sedimentation buried these soils to create paleosols. These paleosols are identified on the basis of the presence of structures and microstructures unique to soils; animal burrows and molds of plant roots of various sizes and types; recognizable soil profile development; and alteration of minerals by soil processes. In many cases, these paleosols are virtually identical to modern soils.

Geologists who have studied upright fossils found in sedimentary rocks exposed in various outcrops for the last 30 years have described the upright fossil trees as being deeply rooted in place and typically rooted in recognizable paleosols. This is in sharp contrast to the claims made by creationists such as Harold Coffin and N. A. Rupke. Geologists, such as Falcon and Rygel et al., have published detailed field sketches and pictures of upright tree fossils with intact root systems, which are rooted within recognizable paleosols. In case of the upright fossil trees of the Yellowstone petrified forests, geologists – again in sharp disagreement with creationists like Harold Coffin – found that the upright fossil trees, except for relatively short stumps, are rooted in place within the underlying sediments. Typically, the sediments within which trees are rooted have paleosols developed within them. Either pictures or diagrams of the Yellowstone upright fossil trees having intact root systems developed within paleosols found within these strata have been published in Retallack (1981, 1997).

 Formation by regeneration

Geologists have also found that some of the larger upright fossil trees found within Carboniferous coal-bearing strata show evidence of regeneration after being partially buried by sediments. In these cases, the trees were clearly alive when they were partially buried by sediments. The accumulated sediment was insufficient to kill the trees immediately because of their size. As a result, some of them developed a new set of roots from their trunks just below the new ground surface. Until they either died or were overwhelmed by the accumulating sediments, these trees would likely continue to regenerate by adding height and new roots with each increment of sediment, eventually leaving several meters of former "trunk" buried underground as sediments accumulated.

Association with marine fossils

Geologists find nothing anomalous about upright fossil trees found in Carboniferous coal-bearing strata being associated with marine or brackish water fossils. Because they lived on subsiding coastal plains or pull-apart basins open to the coast, it was quite frequent for subsidence to periodically outpace the accumulation of sediments such that adjacent shallow marine waters would periodically inundate coastal plains in which the trees were buried. As a result, sediments, containing marine fossils, would periodically accumulate within these areas before being replaced by coastal swamps as sediments either filled in the shallow sea or sea level fell. Also, according to ecological reconstructions by geologists, specific assemblages of the types of trees found as upright fossils occupied brackish water, even saline coastal swamps much like modern mangrove swamps. Thus, finding marine and brackish water fossils associated with these trees is no different than finding brackish water or marine animals living in modern mangrove swamps.

A detailed study of the microstructure of fossils, which have been traditionally identified as “Spirorbis” in the geological literature, by Taylor and Vinn (2006) revealed that they consist of the remains of at least two completely different animals. They discovered that the “Spirorbis” fossils found in sedimentary strata, including the Joggins and other Carboniferous coal measures, deposited from the Ordovician to Triassic periods are the remains of an extinct order of lophophorates (now called microconchids) unrelated to modern marine tube worms (Annelids) to which the genus Spirorbis belongs. This contradicts arguments made by Harold Coffin and other creationists that "Spirorbis" fossils within strata containing polystrate fossils indicate their deposition in a marine environment, because these fossils are classified as the remains of extinct fresh and brackish water microconchids instead of the remains of the marine genera Spirorbis as they have been misidentified in the geologic literature.

Holocene examples

According to scientists, polystrate fossils are fossils which were buried in a geologically short time span either by one large depositional event or by several smaller ones. Geologists see no need to invoke a global flood to explain upright fossils. This position of geologists is supported by numerous documented examples, a few of which are discussed in the below paragraphs, of buried upright tree trunks that have been observed buried in the Holocene volcanic deposits of Mount St. Helens, Skamania County, Washington, and Mount Pinatubo, Philippines; the deltaic and fluvial sediments of the Mississippi River Delta; and in glacial deposits within the midwestern United States. These buried upright trees demonstrate that conventional geologic processes are capable of burying and preserving trees in an upright position such that in time, they will become fossilized.

Volcanic deposits

At this time, the best documented occurrences of unfossilized buried upright trees are found within historic and late Holocene volcanic deposits of Mount St. Helens, Skamania County, Washington, and Mount Pinatubo, Philippines. At Mount St. Helens, both unfossilized and partially fossilized trees were observed in many outcrops of volcanic debris and mud flows (lahars) and pyroclastic flow deposits, which date from 1885 to over 30,000 BP., along the South Toutle and other rivers. Late Holocene forests of upright trees have also been observed as occurring within the volcanic deposits of other Cascade Range volcanoes. In a few years after the eruption of Mount Pinatubo in 1991, the erosion of loose pyroclastic deposits covering its slopes created a series of volcanic lahars, which ultimately buried large parts of the countryside along major streams draining these slopes beneath several meters of volcanic sediments. The repeated deposition of sediments by volcanic lahars and sediment filled rivers not only created innumerable polystrate trees, but also “polystrate” telephone poles, churches, and houses, over a period a few years. The volcanic deposits enclosing these modern upright trees are often virtually identical in their sedimentary structures, external and internal layering, texture, buried soils, and other general character to the volcanic deposits containing the Yellowstone buried forests. As in case of modern forests buried by lahars, the individual buried forests of the Yellowstone Petrified Forest and the layers containing them are very limited in their areal extent.

Deltaic deposits

Within excavations for Interstate Highway 10, borrow pits, landfills, and archaeological surveys, unfossilized upright trees have also been found buried within late Holocene, even historic, fluvial and deltaic sediments underlying the surface of the Mississippi River Delta and the Atchafalaya Basin of Louisiana. In one case, borrow pits dug in the natural levees of Bayou Teche near Patterson, Louisiana, have exposed completely buried, 4 to 6-foot (1.2 to 1.8 meters) high, upright trunks of cypress trees. Northeast of Donaldsonville, Louisiana, a borrow pit excavated for fill used to maintain nearby artificial levees, exposed three levels of rooted upright tree trunks stacked on top of each other lying completely buried beneath the surface of Point Houmas, a patch of floodplain lying within a meander loop of the current course of the Mississippi River. While searching for buried archaeological sites, archaeologists excavated a 12 ft (3.6 meter) high upright rooted cypress tree completely buried within a natural levee of the Atchafalaya River within the Indian Bayou Wildlife Management Area just south of Krotz Springs, Louisiana. Radiocarbon dates and historic documents collected for this archaeological survey, during which this and other upright trees were found, of the Indian Bayou Wildlife Management Area demonstrated that these upright trees were buried in the 1800s, during the initial diversion of Mississippi River's flow into the Atchafalaya River.

Glacial deposits

Unfossilized, late Pleistocene upright trees have been found buried beneath glacial deposits within North America along the southern edge of the Laurentide ice sheet. These buried forests were created when the southern edge of the Laurentide ice sheet locally dammed valleys. As a result, meltwater lakes filled these valleys and submerged forests within them. Sediments released by the melting of the adjacent ice sheet rapidly filled these lakes, which quickly buried and preserved the submerged forests lying within them. One forest of in situ, 24,000 year-old unfossilized upright trees was exposed by excavations for a quarry near Charleston, Illinois. Excavations for a tailings pond about Marquette, Michigan, exposed an in situ forest of unfossilized trees, which are about 10,000 years old, buried in glacial lake and stream sediments.


Again . . . I quote from the beginning of the above article . . . "The word 'polystrate' is NOT a standard geological term. This term is typically found in creationist publications."

Yeah! These creationist retards just like to make shit up! 

And now . . . onward to some more debunkery or debunktation, (yeah, I just made those two words up!) or further debunking of Creationist Flood Geology.

Now then . . . the Creationists usually ask, well . . . what about fossils of clam shells and coral and othere marine life on mountains tops? Doesn't the fossilized coral reefs on high mountain tops prove that a global flood occurred as mentioned in the Genesis account?

OK, recall that in Genesis, it rained for 40 days and 40 nights, and that the waters prevailed upon the earth for about 120 days until it finally subsided from all the land. But, in reality . . . it actually takes a very long long long time for coral reefs to form, and NOT a mere 120 days. Are we really suppose to believe that coral reefs could form in just 120 days? Really??? 

Yes, sea shell fossils, coral fossils, and fossils of other kinds marine life have been found, not ON the mountain tops, but rather . . . . . embedded IN the rock layers on mountain tops. Sea shell fossils are not just found simply lying about on the ground as one would find sea shells lying about on a sandy beach. NO! You have to dig them out with a rock pick. This indicates that marine life was once living at the bottom of an ancient sea-bed, died, and eventually covered over by sediments. to become fossilized.

As mentioned much earlier, the earth's crust is broken up into plate tectonics, and in some regions, one section of the earth's crust will be colliding with another section, causing the two sections to either buckle downward or upward. If it's buckling upward, it forms a mountain range which is gradually and very slowly push up higher and higher over many many millions of years. For example: Mount Everest and the Himalayan mountain range, and also, the rocky Mountains in the Western United States are gradually, and very slowly being pushed up higher and higher at a rate of a couple of millimeters per year.  

And so . . . what was once low lying areas of an ocean bed, have been very very very slowly pushed up over many many many millions of years to become folded upward, and becoming the tops of high mountains with marine fossils embedded in the rock layers.

While there are many such regions on the earth where mountain ranges are slowly being pushed upward, there are some regions where mountains are slowly being eroded away, for example: the Appellation mountains in the Eastern United States. These mountains have been eroded away, and pushed up again, and eroded away again about three different times during the past 500 million years or so. Presently, the Appellation mountains are in the process of being gradually eroded away. But in some far future geological age, the Appellations might get pushed upward again.

Anyway . . . now you know why marine fossils are found, not ON some mountain tops, but rather, IN the rock layers on mountain tops.

Here is a brief article from EvoWiki which is now a project of the RationalWiki Foundation.


Sea fossils have been found 
on mountaintops


Marine fossils have been found on mountaintops. These indicate that the sea once covered the mountains.


Anon, 1985. Life--How Did It Get Here? Watchtower Bible and Tract Society of New York, Inc., p. 203.

Video: The Record and the Flood, Geoscience Research Institute, Loma Linda, CA; Available from ICR or Masterbooks, ph. 1-800-999-3777

Taylor, Ian T., In the Minds of Men, 1991, 3rd Edition, TFE Publishing, P.O. Box 1344, Stn. F., Toronto, M4Y 2T1 Canada, p. 110.

Velikovsky, Immanuel, Earth In Upheaval, 1955, First Edition, Doubleday & Co., Garden City, New York, p. 11.

Did Noah's Flood Cover the Himalayian Mountains

Evidences, The Record and the Flood See also Brown, Walt, Creation Science and the Bible. 


1.) The marine fossils in question have been found deep INSIDE layers of rock in the mountaintops, not "on" them. This clearly suggests that they were laid down and buried deep before the mountains themselves were raised and formed and NOT deposited there by floodwaters as the argument implies.

2.) The most mountain ranges on continents were formed by tectonic forces resulting from collision of continental plates. In some cases these forces uplifted oceanic seafloor and formed mountain ranges, containing sea fossils, out of it. Notably, this process takes millions of years and patterns of wear and rock layers in the mountains confirm this sort of timeline.
3.) If the seashells were carried to the top of mountains by the Great Flood, as suggested by Creationists, they would be smashed to pieces, separated from their corresponding valves (if bivalve, prosobranch, or brachiopod), or heavily eroded, and not be embedded in the rock of the mountains.


Gould, S. J., 1998. The upwardly mobile fossils of Leonardo's living earth. In: Leonardo's Mountain of Clams and the Diet of Worms, Harmony Books, New York. 


So, once again . . . I quote from the above article . . . "The marine fossils in question have been found deep INSIDE layers of rock in the mountaintops, not 'on' them. This clearly suggests that they were laid down and buried deep before the mountains themselves were raised and formed and NOT deposited there by floodwaters as the argument implies."

Yeah! And also . . . . . it takes a far far far longer time for coral reefs to form, and NOT a mere 120 days! Ya got that? Ye Christian Fundamentalist RETARDS!!!

And now . . . we shall go on to another really really really big item that Creationists all have seem have a really really really great big erectile fetish for, and that is . . . . . The Grand Canyon!!! 

Yeah! This is the great big hole in the ground, in which the mere sight of it, causes all the Christian Creationist retards to really get their Jimmies up, resulting in them hauling some major wood!!!

Yes . . . this one is a really great big turn-on for Creationists!

OK, the next graphic below is a map of the Colorado River down in the Grand Canyon of Arizona.

The meandering Colorado River enters Arizona's  Grand Canyon at Lee's Ferry, which is at an elevation of approximately 3,000 feet above sea level. It flows through the Grand Canyon (obviously down hill all the way) along a slow lazy meandering course, ever so slowly and gradually carving away the hard rocky layers of sedimentary deposits, as it has been doing so, for many many millions and millions of years, cutting the canyon ever deeper in to Colorado Basin. The Colorado River eventually exits the Grand Canyon near Whitmore Wash not far from the Bar 10 Ranch at less than 2,000 feet above sea level before flowing into Lake Mead.

Now, the Colorado Plateau rises from an elevation of approximately 4,000 feet above sea level at Lee's Ferry to about 8,000 feet above sea level at the Kaibab Plateau, and then slopes down to a lower elevation of 6,000 feet above sea level, the average elevation of the Colorado Plateau.

The elevations of the plateau and the river are depicted in the next graphic below. 

So, the Colorado River starts out at about 3,000 feet above sea level and flow down hill all the way through the canyon where it exits the canyon at less the 2,000 feet above sea level, while the Colorado Plateau starts out at 4,000 feet above sea level, peaks at 8,000 feet, and levels off at an average of 6,000 feet above sea level as depicted in the graphic above.

Now . . . . . we come to the part where all the Christian Fundamentalists get their soiled under-panties in a bunch in their erectile fetish.

Here's where the Creationist make their usual stupid comments, something like . . . . .Oh! These evolutionists expect us to believe that the Colorado River flowed for millions and millions of years up hill over the plateau to carve out the Grand Canyon!

NO! We "evolutionists" do not expect you Christian retards to believe that the Colorado River flowed up hill over the plateau to carve out the Grand Canyon! Oh! But, you Christian retards expect us to believe that sheet of ices can just float above the earth as in your stupid canopy hypotheses and that the earth's crust can float on top of deep waters as in your fucking retarded hydro-plate hypothesis. Right??? Right??? Right???

OK, here's the skinny on how the Colorado River carved out the Grand canyou.

Uh . . . before I continue . . . why is it that information on something is referred to as the skinny on something? Years ago, people would say that here's the meat and potatoes, or here's the meat on something, or something like that. But now, it's called, the skinny.

So . . . I'm gonna say . . . here's the FAT on how the Colorado River carved out the Grand Canyon . . .   
Yeah! Fat almost rhymes with fact! That's why I prefer to call it THE FAT! Also, the fat sounds like it has more information to offer than the skinny.

Anyway . . . . .

Once again . . . here's the fat on how the Colorado River carved out the Grand Canyon. OK?

First of all, what is now called the Colorado Plateau, was not always high above sea level. Many many millions of years ago, it was once the bottom of a shallow sea bed. 

As mentioned much earlier, the earth's crusts is broken up and divided along fault lines into plate tectonics. These crustal plates slowly move about, sometimes colliding and buckling upward or downward, or one plate slowly sliding over another. The earths crust is very dynamic, always in motion, which is why we have sometimes have severe earthquakes or mild ground tremors.

This once low lying region had risen and subsided over and over a gain a few times. Eventually this section of the earths crust was gradually being pushed up higher and higher over many millions of years. Way way back many many millions and millions of years ago, when this was just a low lying region, a slow lazy meandering river flowed over this low lying flat land.

The next graphic below is an example of a meandering, slow moving, lazy kind of river. 

Williams River in Alaska - A slow lazy river has meandering curves
I imagine that many many millions and millions of years ago, the Colorado River must have looked something like the river in the photo above, a slow lazy river meandering along on some low lying region of land. This of course, is presently the Williams River way up north  in Alaska. But, if this region were being slowly pushed upward to higher elevations, this river would eventually carve a deep canyon, if given many millions of years, So, into the future, we could then have another deep canyon, almost like another Grand Canyon. 

And, this is what has been happening over the many many millions and millions of years. The land was slowly being pushed up to higher and higher elevations, while at the same time, the meandering  Colorado river was slowly and lazily carving it's way deeper and deeper into the sedimentary rock layers.

So, a slow lazy kind of river just sort of meanders around, while a much faster river flows more straight as depicted in the next graphic below.

A fast moving river is more straight without having a lot of curves
But, in the meantime . . . . . getting back to our lazy meandering river again. 

The Colorado River has very slowly carved out the Grand Canyon as the plateau was very slowly being up-lifted over many many many many many millions and millions of years, and the Colorado River was carving out the canyon at the about the same rate as the plateau was being uplifted.

So, ya Christian Fundamentalist retards! The Colorado river did not have to flow up hill after all!!! Ya got that, ya fucking retards???

The Colorado River was always flowing down hill, happily carving it's way down into the rock layers of the plateau region as it was slowly rising to higher elevations.

And yes, the Colorado River took many millions of years to carve out the Grand Canyon through the hard rocky layers of the Colorado Plateau. Even a slow lazy river can do a lot of carving away from rock layers, given enough time, like many millions of years.

Oh! But many Christian Fundamentalist Creationist retards actually believe that the Grand Canyon could have been carved out in less than a day during the Biblical Genesis flood! 

Really!!! They actually believe this shit!

OK my dear passengers. Please join me in the entertainment coach as we watch a video of how creationist retard, Eric Hovind, son of jailbird, Kent Hovind, made a total and complete ass of himself during the recent flash flood of April 30,2014 in Pensacola, Florida.

Eric Hovind Has Water On The Brain!

And here's another video also featuring Christard Funny-mentalist retard, Eric Hovind.

But, you will have to click on this link to watch it.

The Flood Waters of Pensacola


The video is put up by Creation Today.

Here is the description that is under the video.

Published on May 1, 2014

Learn more about the devastation on Eric's Blog:

Category -  Education

License -  Standard YouTube License

Yeah! For some reason, I can not post Eric Hovind's crappy-ass video here!

But then . . . that's right-wing Christian Fundamentalist CENSORSHIP for ya! So, what can ya expect? Eh?

Anyway . . . . .

Eric Hovind is a real low-life douche-bag to be exploiting the tragedy of the recent flood in Pensacola Florida. A lot of people died in that God damn flood!!!

OK, here was the situation . . . . . 

Eric Hovind went about in Pensacola, Florida, asking people on the streets their opinions, if they believed whether the flood damage and the erosion was cause by a lot of water, or if it was cause by a lot of time.  Yeah! He had approached a lot of people on the streets asking them his idiotic questions. He had approached people of just about every age group, even asking young children if they thought that the flood was caused by a lot of water, or a lot of time. 

I really wish that Eric Hovind would have just stayed away from the younger kids in the neighborhood, and NOT try to brain-wash them before they're old enough to think for themselves. If I had been living in the hood, I would have confronted him, and told him to leave the younger kids alone, or else, I would get out my little Samsung cell phone and dial  911 and called the cops on that mother-fucker! Yeah! I would have called the PO PO on him! Uh huh! I would have dropped a dime on that sorry-ass piece of shit! As far as I'm concerned, Eric Hovind just another child molester. No, I don't mean sexually, but rather, that he goes around trying to mind-fuck these younger kids to get them all indoctrinated into his retarded Creationist cult! Religion is actually child abuse!

Yeah! I most sincerely hope . . . that someday . . . real soon, someone jumps that son-of-a-bitch, and knocks that child molesting mind-fucker face down in the mud, ties his hands behind his back, shoves a great big cow-flop into his mouth, sews his lips shut, and kicks him in the balls!!!

And also . . . I find it most despicable of Eric Hovind to be exploiting this tragedy by pestering the residence on the streets. He seriously needs to pack his Gucci bag and get outta Dodge before he's run outta town on a rail, and modeling the latest fashions in Tar and Feather-ware!  

Anyway . . . . .

Eric Hovind believes that the Grand Canyon was carved out quit rapidly during the Biblical Genesis flood, that it could have been carved out in a matter of hours or a few days or so. Yeah! Really!!!

But, the Grand Canyon was not carved out by rapidly flowing waters, else, it would look more like a straight gully, or a straight trench. Oh! But Christard Funny-mentalist retards expect us all to believe that the flood waters of Genesis could go rapidly streaming around many sharp bends, as shown in the graphic below.

The Horseshoe Bend - one of many such meandering bends along the Colorado River
No, the Grand Canyon was NOT carved out by a rapidly flowing stream, but rather, it was carved out by a slow lazy meandering river. I should know, because I know lazy. I should know because I'm kind of lazy myself. Well . . . physically that is. But, I do like to keep my mind active. I just have a fat lazy body, but I have a very active mind that can run circles around these creationist retards!

Well . . . . . anyway . . . . .

I do know a thing or two about rapidly flowing rivers, and slow lazy meandering rivers. I know lazy!

It is quite obvious that the flood damage and all the soil erosion in Pensacola, Florida, was caused by a lot of water, a big deluge of water in a relatively short time, something like, 26 inches of rain in just 24 hours. But, the reason why so much of the soil was eroded away in such a short time is because, in that area around Florida, it is mostly lose sandy top-soil that can easily be washed away.

On the other hand . . . . . when the Colorado River was (and still is) carving out the Grand Canyon, that slow lazy meandering river had to be carving away through solid hard layers of rock, and NOT through lose sandy top-soil. And it takes a very long long long long long time for a slow lazy meandering river to carve it's way down through many layers of hard rocky sediments. As I said before, I know lazy.

And speaking of lazy, and of rivers . . . . . Here's a couple of songs I'm sure you'll love. Some old time melodies about rivers.

The Ink Spots - Up A Lazy River 

As usual . . . the train conductor will lead as we sing along to these lyrics.

Up A Lazy River

Up a lazy river by the old mill run
The lazy, lazy river in the noon day sun
Linger in the shade of a kind old tree
Throw away your troubles
Dream a dream with me-ee

Up a lazy river where the robin's so-ong
Awakes the bright new morning
Where we can move along
Blue skies up above, everyone's in love
Up a lazy river, how happy you could be
Up a lazy river-er with me

Up a lazy river by the old mill run
The lazy, lazy river in the noon day sun
Linger in the shade of a kind old tree
Throw away your troubles
Dream a dream with me

Up a lazy river where the robin's song
Awakes the bright new mornin'
Where we can move along
Blue skies up above, everyone's in love
Up a lazy river, how happy you could be
Up a lazy river-er with me

Woh, up a lazy river by the o-old mill run
The lazy, lazy river in the noo-oon day sun
Linger in the shade of a kind old tree
Throw away your-our troubles
Dream a dream with me

Up a lazy river where the robi-in's song
Awakes the bright new morning
Where we can move along
Blue skies up above, everyone's in love
Up a lazy river, how happy you could be
Up a lazy river-er with me-ee-ee-ee
Up - a lazy ri-iver - with me . . .

And here's another oldie but goodie

Paul Robeson - Ol' Man River (Showboat - 1936) 
J.Kern O. Hammerstein

Again, the train conductor with lead us as we all sing along with these lyrics.

Old Man River

Here we all work 'long the Mississippi
Here we all work, while the white boys play
Gettin' no rest from the dawn till the sunset
Gettin' no rest till the judgment day

You don't look up, you don't look down
You don't dare make the rich boss frown
Bend your knees and bow your head
And tote that barge until you're dead

Let me go away from the Mississippi
Let me go away from the rich man boss
Show me that stream called the River of Jordan
That's the old stream that I long to cross

Old Man River, Old Man River
He don't say nothin', he must know somethin'
Old Man River, he just keeps rollin' along

You know, you know he don't plant taters
And we all know the man don't plant no cotton
And then, then they plant 'em
Oh the Lord knows they are soon forgotten
But Old Man River, he just keeps rollin' along

You, you and me, you know sometimes
We have to we have to sweat, sweat and strain
Our bodies, our bodies are all achin'
And wracked with a whole lot of pain

Tote that barge, lift that bale, you get a little drunk
And you land in jail

I get weary and so sick of tryin'
I'm tired of livin', and afraid of dyin'
But Old Man River, he just keeps rollin' along
Old Man River, he just keeps rollin' along

Well . . . . . these two river songs don't have anything to do with the Colorado River down in the Grand Canyon of Arizona. But, the Colorado River, he is a lazy old river who's been slowly meandering, and carving  away at the Grand Canyon, just slowly carving it out ever deeper and deeper. And that old Colorado River, he really is an old old man who's been at it for many many millions of years. 

So, kudos to you, Old Man Colorado River! You've been doing a beautiful bang up job of carving out that most magnificent canyon. And so, you just keep on doing what you're doing all along, old man!

Anyway . . . . .

Here is a song about the Colorado River which sounds kind of jazzy.

 Colorado River Song

And here's a really fine instrumental music video of the Grand Canyon. Just kick back and relax and have a dark roast coffee and a pipe or cigar while listening to the music.

Nicholas Gunn - The Music of the Grand Canyon

I hope you all enjoyed these fine musical selections.

We are now homeward bound from the Land of the Tards! 

But until then . . . my dear passengers, if you all please look out toward the left, you will see some really beautiful scenes of the Grand Canyon. As you all know by now . . . everything in the Land of the Tards that is seen off to the right is ugly, stupid, and moronic, and absolutely hideous!!! 

But, all that can be seen off to the left is educational, informative, beautiful, and entertaining. 

And so . . . look off to the left and see the most magnificent Grand Canyon, and the Skywalk!

This was probably some proposed artist's concept before it was actually built.
A Montage of Actual Photos of The Grand Canyon Skywalk
The next photo below is a panoramic view of the Grand Canyon.

Right-click your mouse on the image, and open in new tab for a much much much larger view!!!
WOW! The above image is really huge! It is one really great big fat panoramic view of the Grand Canyon. It is about 12,080 x 3,020 pixels and it takes up 3.92 MB (Mega Bytes) of memory! When I discovered this image while doing a Google search, I just had to take possession of it! And now it's mine! All mine! Yeah! I'm like a great big greedy and happy fat kid in a candy store! 

OK, if you all really want to get an eye-full, just right-click you mouse on the above image and open in a new tab, and you will see the great big fat full-sized version of the photo. Yeah! Talk about some Eye Candy!

Ah yes indeed! All of my dear passengers on board my train, the Midnight Science Express, all must have hungry eyes and hungry minds, eager to see and learn more and more. We must be gluttons for knowledge, unlike all them Christian Fundamentalist retards who are merely satisfied with their meager little portions of Biblical pablum and  idiotic fairy tales from their BUY-BULL!

Yeah! The Bible is just baby food for infantile little minds!

But on my train, in the diner coach, I serve up humongous portions of knowledge and facts, the meat and potatoes for the mind, and it's all served up FREE of charge.  It's my All You Can Eat Buffet for the brain!

Anyway . . . . .
We are now coming to the end of our journey through the Land of the Tards, and very soon now, the Midnight Science Express will be pulling into Debunction Junction.

We're pulling in now. Clickity-clack clickity-clck clickity-clack! Whoo! Whoo! Clickity-clack clickity-clck clickity-clack! SHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSHSH!!! Ding ding ding ding ding ding ding!

Well . . . . . the train has come to a full stop.

And here we are, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, home at last!

Once again, my dear passengers, we are now safely home from our torturous journey through the Land of the Tards! I hope you all thoroughly enjoyed the tour. And parents . . . please, please, by all means, please do encourage your kids to take an interest in the wonders of nature. Encourage them to ask questions. Yes, I know, sometime kids like to ask so many questions that it gets to be a pain sometimes. But, be honest with your children, If your kids ask you a lot of questions that you're not able to answer, just simply be honest and say, I don't know, but, let's find out!

Take your kids to the public library. Kids will always find some books that will spark their interest in something. Children are just naturally curious. Also, leave a pair of binoculars, a magnetic compass, and a magnifying glass on the living room coffee table. Let them play with tools, like saws and hammers, etc. etc.

Yeah! It sort of reminds me of a song kids use to sing back in grade school many years ago.

Saws and planes and hammers
are a lot more fun than toys!
Bing Bang Bing Bang!
Oh what a jolly noise!

Yes, I remember when I was a kid was way way back in the early 1960s in our school song book, it even had a song about the planets. 

I'm going to build me a rocket ship.
And then I'll go on a long long trip!
To Venus and Jupiter, Saturn and Mars.
Much faster than sound I'll steer by the stars!
Oh what fun it will be!
No one there but me!
I don't know just when
I'll be home again. 

Encourage your kids to do some outdoor activities. Teach them to fly kites, or get some toy airplanes that actually fly. Videos games are fine, but sometime kids need to go outside. Take your kids hiking in the woods. Get them some geologist type of rock picks and go out looking for fossils. I use to collect interesting looking rocks and fossils when I was a kid. Leave some road maps laying around.

Also, when school is out for the summer, take your kids out at night to look up at the stars through a pair of binoculars, or get a reasonably priced telescope. 

Yeah! Science is cool! Science rules! Astronomy is FAR OUT!!! And Geology ROCKS!!!

And finally . . . above all . . . encourage your kids to study their science and math in school, and get them to eat their broccoli and red beets. Republican retards like George W Bush and Michele Bachmann just absolutely hate broccoli and red beets! But we know what we like. Don't we. Republicans eat baby food!

OK, enough of the cynicism! I just wanted to leave you all with some final thoughts before we depart, and I hope you all have a safe trip home.

In the meantime . . . . .

As you all return to your homes, I'll be staying on board the train, which is my home, and makeing preparations and scheduling our next trip out of Debunction Junction.

Well, anyway . . . . . . .

Thank you all for riding on board the Midnight Science Express and 
I hope to see you all again real soon. 


  We are too big for our britches! 
  We go out mooning the world!

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ THE END ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

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